‘Tis the Season for “Mommy I want that…” Kids everywhere are getting bombarded with commercials touting the latest and greatest hot new toy. Parents are conflicted not wanting to over indulge their kids but also not wanting them to feel left out among their peers.
It drives me crazy that kids have such high expectations from Santa and from their parents. I have seen typically, well-tempered children pout if they don’t get the popular new toy (never-mind that you spent your entire lunch break going to six stores looking for the stupid thing and stole two hours from your employer searching online!). During today’s interview, Dr. Pete Stavinoah explained that this behavior is a natural tendency for children who want to fit in with peers. Consequently, parents should not panic if their child throws a tantrum. Instead, parents are challenged to teach their children that gaining peer acceptance is not about the things they have, but rather the person they are.
Dr. Pete also provided some steps that parents can take to teach their children feelings of generosity and diminish the sense of greed. These include:
1. Be a Good Example
If your nick-name is Ebenezer during the holidays, you may want to consider whether you are reflecting the spirit of the season to your children. Demonstrating generosity and gratitude will help ensure these values are instilled in your children.
2. Plan Activities that Demonstrate the Holiday Spirit
Engage the kids in activities that demonstrate the spirit of the holidays. For example, visit a nursing home, collect canned goods, or serve meals at a homeless shelter.
3. Go Through the Toy Boxes and Get Rid of Unwanted Toys
No matter how much he may convince you otherwise, your ten-year-old can let go of some of the toys that are making the play room closet a real source of embarrassment. In addition, mom needs to be a big girl and part with some of those never-played-with baby toys that are collecting dust. Parents can take advantage of this opportunity to talk to their children about how these toys could make another, less fortunate child very happy.
4. Don’t Pass On the Stress you are Experiencing to your Child
If you are freaking out about the in-laws coming or if you and your spouse fight about who stepped on the Christmas lights, chances are this stress will be passed down to your kids. If you truly want your children to appreciate and demonstrate the spirit of the holidays, parents need to make certain they are communicating the joy of the season.
5. Set Reasonable Expectations
Parents should spend some time setting reasonable expectations for kids hoping to get the X Box and the I Pod and the Digital Camera. Kids need to know that even Santa works on a budget.
Not wanting to let our kids down is the reason why we get trampled in the toy store trying to grab one of the hot new dolls or video games. I get it – we don’t want our kids to be disappointed Christmas morning. However, parents need to be reminded that teaching the value of generosity to your children will be a gift that will last longer than the batteries of the Turbo Monster Remote Control Truck.
Dad and I laughed and cried at your blogs. Your sense of the absurb is wonderful and your ability to tell a 'moving' story is really something. We are so proud of you and can't wait to read your book. Love, MOM