Fran's World…and Welcome to It!

Ever get so busy that you forget what day of the week it is? That was the kind of week it was for me.

DRUGS
Started out with getting up at 4:30 AM on Monday morning to catch a plane out to Dallas... land... and then an hour later get dressed for rehearsals for an imposter gig I was doing for a pharmaceutical company called, Meda--the makers of Soma, Astelin and Optivar. I had to memorize words that honestly at points I was having trouble pronouncing.... (I tell ya between this and taking care of my mom... I'm really getting quite a medical education.)

Anyway, I played, a newbie salesperson, Christine Johnson, all day Monday and Tuesday to 600 unsuspecting salespeople at their annual meeting...until it was revealed that my fast talking on stage spiel was not really a nervous quirk of a new saleswoman...but that I was really Fran Capo...fast talker...it went over great... people laughed and by Tuesday afternoon I was back on the plane headed home to New York for a midnight arrival... well at least that was the plan.

The plane was delayed due to bad weather in the layover city Chicago. And has luck would have it my airport in Westchester closes at midnight... so this Cinderella would not be flying into Westchester... so I took a plane into JFK instead... figured I could sleep at my Howard Beach house... that was until I realized no one was home to watch my bedridden mom if I did that... so I called up my boyfriend... and my knight in shining armor agreed to pick me up at 3:30 in the morning from JFK and drive me home. I arrived home exhausted but happy... that was until I found out we had no water!

Yup, the pump broke... which means you cannot flush the toilet... not good when you are nursing a mom who has a bad case of the runs....

In addition, when I woke up a few hours later on Wed morning to the sound of a crane in my front yard (working on the in ground pump) I realized I had a really bad head cold... ah... things were going very smoothly.... (Yeah!) anyway... got the news the pump had to be replaced... decided to handle that by taking a long walk on the country road to clear my head... returned an hour later... they told me the pump was fixed... well if it was... the water in the faucets didn't know it... so had to call the guys... a Mr. Pump Man... back again.

After the morning craziness... did the routine with my mom, including changing her wound dressing, feeding, meds etc... now to wake up my darling son and get him to drive me to the airport to get my car from Westchester before he heads to school.

Day progressing... cold getting worse... trying not to sneeze on sick mother... she is supposed to be recovering... not catching so bubonic plaque from her daughter.

Answered emails... did a voice over audition for the Georgia Lottery, went to the doctors... called a woman back who asked if I would be the celebrity at a fund raiser for Make a Wish foundation... told her yes...

UNEXPECTED COMEDY
Now it's Friday, I figured I could rest all night... nope... found out I had a gig at a country club in Connecticut. I thought the gig was cancelled... but it wasn't. My boyfriend (aka knight in shining Escalade) drove me to my gig, so I could sleep in the car and get some rest. Home at 2:30 AM...

SOAP OPERA SATURDAY
Everything seems like one long day with a two-hour nap in between.
Saturday afternoon... was treated to a wonderful, healthy lunch compliments of my new friend, actor/writer Lance Gutterman from CBS, joining us was his two good friends, actress Irene Kristen (Plays Roxy on One Life to Live), and his good friend Tamara – former stage manager from a soap opera... also dining with us was my good friend, Fitness Celebrity John Basedow... we all watched what we ate around John... yeah one of the great benefits when you eat with someone in shape.

After lunch, John, myself, Lance and another friend...
Walked around Manhattan stopping in Barnes and Nobles and Borders along the way... Why to do what any good author would do.... sign copies of our books that were in stock. John was signing copies of his new book, Fitness Made Simple and I was signing copies of my It Happened in New York book. When a book is signed by the author, the store put a little sticker on it to let people knows it's special... kind of reminds me of when I got a star in kindergarten for good behavior.

After 100 blocks of walking... John and I called it a night... (believe me this was quick for us...) Why? Because we both had to get up early.

I had to be up with the roosters to do the Breast Cancer walk with my Putnam Valley Curves Girls, and John was doing the Heart Walk.
Two parts of the body you want to keep in good shape, breasts and hearts...

BREASTS
Anyway, my breasts (and the rest of me) met the team at the Curves parking lot at 8 a.m. We convoyed to the park and took a team photo.

By 9 AM we were on the starting line. This was our second year in a row doing the benefit. This year luckily there was no rain. Theresa, the team captain and owner of Curves had a big sign made up. I volunteered to hold it... figured it would be a good arm work out...

Something about holding up a big sign and walking makes you feel like you are in a parade. Which in my head means we need some kind of marching song... so with the help of Eilleen (a boyscout den mother and breast cancer survivor!) we made up a Curves song on the spot.

All 15 of us began to sing... " Wherever we go...people want to know, who we are...so we tell them...we're from Curves... Putnam Valley Curves...." The song ended kind of abruptly so I added.... "Belly workouts, arms a raisin, butts a shaking..." It caused smiles around us. We even held our sign backwards so the people behind us could see who we were.

After a mile we got bored with that song, so we started singing... our own rendition of "These boots are made for walkin." It went like this...
"These breasts are made for walkin, and that's just what they'll do, one of these days these breasts are gonna walk all over you... tat a da, tad a da..." The men around us were laughing.

Needless to say the three miles went very quickly.

CELBRITY HOMETOWN SPEAKER
But, could I rest then... Nope... had to run home to write a hour long speech that I was supposed to be giving that night at the 70th Anniversary of the Putnam Valley library...and since I had been asked to be the celebrity keynote speaker... thought it might be a good time to get my act together.

Now you gotta understand in a small town this is a huge thing.
All the hotshots of the town were going to be there... the councilmen and woman, the board members, teachers, newspaper reporters' oldest townspeople, politicians of all parties, not to mention the local merchants. There was no way I wanted to embarrass myself and not have a speech prepared.

Besides they had a poster with my face plastered all around town...

At the Deli I was above the chips.... nothing like being positioned on the wall of fame at the deli... although if you look I am in some pretty cool company... Dr. Ruth and Judge Judy live in this town... and The Soparanos shot the last episode on this lake....

My picture was at the pharmacy, the banks, the dance studio, in the local penny saver, given out at town day... and my favorite... my picture was also up at the post office...the only time in my life I could say I was happy to see my picture on the post office wall... and to think... I didn't even commit a crime.

In one hour I wrote my speech, put notes on cue cards and was ready... the library event was going on from 2-7pm... a long night with awards, speeches, food, dancing, more food, more dancing... and then me. The atmosphere was fantastic... people all happy, friendly... it's a huge change from my Queens upbringing... and I loved it.

Prior to going on... I chatted with tons of people. Putnam is a really artsy town, with tons of history... it was really cool to be a part of this.

I was talking to a lot of the town folk... like this 86 year old woman who remembers going to school when there were only 5 people in her class (okay it was in her graduating class but still... I've had more people in an elevator with me!) Also spoke to a cool councilman, Tom who had a black bear in his backyard... and when he called Animal Safety Patrol... he was told that his bird-feeders were attracting the bears... etc. By the time I went on that night I had enough material for a whole new act.

I did my performance, the crowd was awesome, the reporter was laughing... and the good thing was my voice (my very sore voice) lasted throughout the whole thing.

At the end, a bunch of books were sold, signed autographs, took pictures with folks, and got offered other speaking engagements (one was at a women's prison) and just had a grand ole time.

My son was there, as was my knight in shining armor carried my unsold books back to his awaiting escalade.

As he closed the trunk of his car he said, "Now Capo after seven days of non stop movement, can we just go home and relax?" I nodded, "Yes, please... it was fun... but even I get tired." He smiled, "Good it's a nice night, feed your mom her dinner, and then I heard that Mars is going to be out in full force in the moon lit sky, we can watch it from my balcony."

And that's exactly what we did...

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