Anyway, our plan was to attend three shows, and do commentary on each.

The first show we attended was the Charles Nolan Show. We waited with press, were let in, and Carlene secured our seats. Jarett went to the press area to set up and when we he was ready...we went on the runway to do our "Stand up." As we are about to do our spiel...we see Vanessa Williams. So we figured why not shoot the spiel near her.

We started talking and joking and could see she was getting kick out of it. After a few minutes we were booted off the runaway along with all the other press and the show began.

To my surprise...I actually liked Nolan's stuff, it looked like real people could wear it! I actually started to get into it and caught myself bopping to the music!

However as you learn with these fashion shows, I couldn't bop long because the whole shebang was over in twenty minutes. The models came out in a parade-like fashion and then the designer makes his grand entrance about ten feet into the runway, bows and quickly ducks out—hopefully to a standing ovation. Then the lights come on, the camera crews break down quickly and run into the lobby hoping to capture interviews with celebrities.

One show, "Full Frontal "recognized John and did a fantastic interview with him. I'm sure the magazine or whatever it is, is very respectable in the Fashion world...but you gotta admit the name, "Full Frontal" sounds like the name of some porn flick karate movie. Luckily, Carlene knows all this stuff, and knows they are respected in the fashion world. I on the other hand might have made some comment and gotten us kicked out.

Anyway, all kidding aside, I have to say, that I had no idea who Charles Nolan was before, but I made a mental note to look for his stuff in the stores. Not to mention, the guy had class...he gave nice gift bags for everyone as a parting gift.

With a few minutes to spare, we headed to fashion show #2, which took place in a small tent, which I believe was called, "The Salon."

I can't remember the name of the second designer, but I do know there were a lot of celebrities there. Once again, John and I made our way to the runway and began shooting. Of course positioning ourselves right in front of the big wigs in the fashion world is key. You don't want to be talking about fashion and have some guy picking his nose in the background. (Then again if I was a host on Comedy Central I might.) The bottom line is Carlene and John recognize these people...and I know how to bully my way on the runway to get right smack in front of them, so they can hear us.

So there we are on the runway with the bright lights in our face ready to make commentary. Now I have to make an aside comment here so you understand what is going on internally. John fits in better on the runway than I do. After all, this Fitness-made-simple guy friend of mine...is tall with chiseled cheeks, in great shape, and used to be a model himself. Me on the other hand, I'm a stand up comic...shorter, and not exactly a size 2. However, I do serve a purpose, I am pretty and happen to be the comedic relief of the show. Plus I am adventure girl, and for me, this is a true adventure...not saying out loud what I really think so we don't' get thrown out, but saying enough of what I think to make it funny.

The thing is...I look around and all these people are all taking this stuff very seriously and so I am tempted to joke even more. That is until I have flash backs of Meryl Streep in the movie, "The Devil wears Prada". Then I start to imagine some fashion guru person coming up to me in the middle of my comedic commentary and saying, "Oh you find this funny do you? You do realize that that thing you are wearing someone designed, and now you are wearing it! You only have choices from the things we design!" Of course to which I would reply...true, but this thing I'm wearing didn't cost me $8000, and looks like it's from the movie alien."
To which she would reply, "Yes, I can see it did not cost you $8,000, probably cost you eighty cents." Then I'd have to say, "Oh is there a designer here who charges that?"
Then we'd get into a catfight, it would be in the dailies, and I'd be banned from the Fashion World forever. Okay, so with this imaginary conversation I begin my second "stand up piece with John."

I decided to aim for "safe comedy." What's safe comedy? Making fun of yourself or someone you know in the situation, instead of someone who can get easily offended...like a nearby fashion designer. So when John made a comment that the fashion shows always start fashionable late, I figured it was the perfect time to have a little fun and mention to John that it was he and not I who was a few minutes late today. You see John is convinced I'm usually late, and I pointed out...that I am only late on occasion. But that maybe I should have been late today since then I would have been in fashion. But for the record I wanted it known that he was late...or was he just trying to be in fashion? The nearby fashion people seemed to get a kick out of this because they were smiling and intently listening.
(See that's safe comedy.)

Anyway, we watched the second show, applauded and left. This time with no goody bags.

Next we headed to the big to do of the evening, Chado by Ralph Rucci. His event was taking place in the TENT. Although they were all in tents...this was THE TENT. The big Kahuna of tents where easily a thousand people could fit.

In this tent, cameras were flashing, reporters were all over the place, and Martha Stewart was practically center stage with about five mikes in her face. Of course I was tempted to go up to her..."Hey Martha remember me, the fast talker...The one hired to pull the April fools day prank on you on your show! – but then I decided...ah maybe not the place to do it."

At this point...Jarett said we had plenty of footage so we just watched the show. It was very dramatic with this jungle like music, and sharp lighting effects. I felt as if the models might come out and do a catfight.

John and I sat next to each other commenting on the attire. "Yeah I'd wear that..." Nah...wouldn't like that...etc. (Of course John wasn't' saying he'd wear the dress.) But the common theme we noticed was, the stuff we thought was wearable, got mere nods, but the items that to me look like they were made from some kind of dead poodle material...got applause, smiles and even standing ovations.
Go figure...and thus why I am a comic and not a fashion consultant.

Then John turned to me, "Fran do you notice their heads are all so shiny."
I looked closely. "John, I think they are wearing cellophane on their heads."
He looked, "I think you are right."

Of course in the modeling world it probably has some fancy smancy name...but what do I know. I've called Potpourri, dead flowers and almost got thrown out of a shop once.

Anyway, after our observation the show was soon over. The model parade came out, then the designer came out and the crowd gave him a standing ovation.

...John and I made our final comments to end our webisode.

Jarett, who looked like he had his fill, said "goodbye", packed up and was out of there in a flash.

Carlene, John and I walked out to the lobby and were headed to the car when some fans stopped us. After a few autographs we were on our way.

At that point I turned to Carlene, "So what did you think of the last show?"
"It was fabulous. It's what you call high fashion."
"Well I'd have to be "high" to wear that stuff!"
"Fran, it's the stuff actresses would wear on the Red Carpet during Oscar night." She said.
Then I thought about it. MMMM, what if I won the Oscar for that new dramatic role I'm in? Would I wear one of those Pokka dotted dresses with the huge bow that looks like it belongs on a Macy's day float?
Probably not...but then again...if they offered it to me and it was worth a million bucks...I just might. With food for thought, I took my silk purple scarf, flung it around my shoulder dramatically and headed into the night.