Note: I was in the Holiday Inn in Philadelphia because I was doing a television show and comedy gig that same night.

7:00 a.m. Cell phone alarm wakes me up so I can call my son, Spencer and tell him to get up. The kid sleeps like a log and even though he usually has three alarms set, sleeps through them. So I call him and make sure he is up. Yeah, he’s in college…I guess when he’s married his wife can take over from here.

7:30 a.m. I decide to get up and do some quick exercises - few sit-ups, some jumping jacks and some stretching.

8:00 a.m. Take a shower, wash my hair. Get dressed. Take extra care with my make up because I’m not sure if this morning show has a makeup artist or not. Have to apply the makeup a little heavier to appear natural on Television.

8:30 a.m. Go over the script that NBC10! emailed me. In addition to my regular interview segment, they want me to talk fast and announce the winners of a contest at the end of their show. I’m also going to give away five pairs of tickets to the Comedy Cabaret, the comedy club which set up this interview and where I am performing tonight.

8:45 a.m. Check to make sure I have all my show and tell stuff for my segment;
I check to see that I have:
A copy of the Ripley’s Book I’m in,
A copy of my new book; It Happened in New York (debate whether I should also bring a copy of my It Happened in PA book, since I am in Philadelphia;
The shrunken cup from the Titanic dive along with a picture of me in the submersible.
The picture of me doing the book signing on the top of Kilimanjaro.
Also need my makeup, a camera to take shots for the blog and my photo album, a blank VHS and DVD so I can have the producer mail me a copy of the show after it airs.
The script copy to read for the end of the show,
and finally… the message points - the list of times I’m performing at the Comedy Cabaret plug.

8:50 a.m. Make a quick call to Bill at Intelihosts. Want to make sure all the pages on my website link to the right places before I go on air. NBC10! says they will link my website to theirs. Bill promises me everything is in order. I trust him since I have no computer access at the moment.

9:00 a.m. Head out of room.
Darn it’s raining. My hair is going to frizz. My umbrella is in the car, so I put my bag over my head and run to the car. Not attractive, but efficient. Originally I was going to walk the two blocks from the hotel to the studio…but not when I have to go on camera.

9:05 a.m. Arrive at studio, jeez that was really close, barely had time to put the seatbelt on. Pass security, given a name badge. Wait in lobby till producer comes and takes me to green room.

9:15 a.m. (PA) Production Assistant greets me and takes me to green room. Another guest is in the elevator with us. He has this HUGE bag. I ask him what’s in it. He says it’s a mystery and winks. Then he asks me what's in my bag. I tell him it’s a mystery and wink back. We both laugh. We exit the elevator and head in different directions. I’m escorted to the green room, which is not green of course. It's located, right near the live morning show set, for quick access to guests.
Already in the Green room is this kid, Jord Jayrodin, he is a one-man-band and is doing a live on-line multimedia documentary of himself traveling around the world living only off the money he makes from street performing. They are going to have him play a different song during each cut to commercial. His contraption has symbols, drums, harmonica, guitar etc. all hooked into one. I feel as if I stepped back into Vaudeville.

9:20 a.m. Camera man, Matt comes up to me and asks if I wouldn’t mind doing a teaser for my upcoming segment. I go into the studio area before the audience is let in and do a fast talking intro of myself complete with holding up props really fast. He gets a kick out of it.

9:25 am. I walk the 20 steps back into the green room. I go take a picture of this one-man band but am whisked away to makeup. I make a note to take a picture later on so I can show it on my blog.

9:30 a.m. I’m in makeup, which is set up in the bathroom. I meet the makeup lady, Anita Bennett. Anita is a wonderful lady who has been in the business for many years. She used to work on the Cosby Show, then on the View when it first started up, on the Rosie Show for a while, then on some news shows…she certainly gets around. She is very positive. Anita is about to make me up, but then Jord is whisked in. The PA says, "Jord has to go on the first segment, please make him up". I move out of the chair and Jord pops in. He is a cute kid with dimples. Anita comments on them. She puts a light powder on him, comments if he stayed out late last night. We both notice hickies on his neck. He blushes. Anita says, "ah, love bites." We tease him.
Meanwhile back at the set, the audience is being let in and instructed on what to do.

9:45 a.m. I get back in the chair. Just as Anita is about to start on me, Amy Sedaris, comedienne, actress and cup cake baker gets sent in. (Amy used to play a prostitute who went back to high school on a Comedy Central show called, "Strangers with Candy". She now has a craft book out and will be doing a craft on the show today.)
Her segment is before mine so she needs to get made up before me as well. Do I mind? Not at all…this is the way of TV. Anita, Amy and I talk about the business as she gets made up.

10:00 a.m. The show starts. I’m still in makeup…but no problem I don’t go on until around 10:30. I’m told by Anita that the perfect lipstick color for me is a mixture of pink and coral. We talk some more. Anita gives me a business contact of hers to call to pitch one of my reality shows. We hug and Anita tells me she sees good things for me in the future.

10:10 a.m. Back in the green room. There are more guests in there now.
On the table of the green room is a huge very tempting plate of donuts, some doused in white powder…I love that… Luckily I have my pink coral lipstick on and I don’t want to ruin it for on camera, nor do I want to look like I was caught in the middle of a drug bust. So I pass on the white powdered donuts.
Jord is already on the air. In the room with me is a nutrition doctor and his PR lady. He laughs that there are donuts of all things in the green room with him. Next to the green room we can smell food cooking. A chef turned author who is a regular on the show is cooking up a storm in the nearby kitchen.

10:15 a.m. Amy is on camera. She is doing her crafts and joking around. Her segment goes great.

10:20 a.m. Estee Lauder’s granddaughter (At least I think that’s who it is), has a cook book as well. I imagine it will smell like something you will want to wear.

10:30 a.m. The chef from next door, goes on and talks about her cookbook. I'm feeling left out. Maybe I, the non-cooker, should write a book, called, "How not to cook - in one easy lesson. Don't ! There's always take-out. As I'm contemplating my non-cookbook cookbook, the sound guy comes in and mikes me for my segment.

10:34 The fast talking promo I did earlier airs before the commercial break. It serves as a teaser that I am up next.

10:35 a.m. I go on set. I do my fast talking segment, show all my pictures, joke with the hosts, announce the comedy show times and have a great time.

10:55 a.m. I am brought outside with some contestants who are up for winning a chance at getting an all expense paid, Apple Vacation to the Caribbean. It’s raining so we are all under umbrellas. I see this big NBC peacock bird standing there. He motions to me. I walk over.
He whispers, “Remember the bag in the elevator!”
I hesitate a moment. "Ah yes…that's what was in the bag? A bird suit. Somehow I find it very funny that the very cute guy in the elevator is now dressed as a peacock.
I whisper, "Okay, Mr. Bird you are about to see my mystery talent as well".
We go live on camera. I quickly rattle off the contest rules and pick a winner out of a basket. The old man who won didn't know what hit him. Before he can smile I announce that the others contestants get tickets to the Comedy Cabaret. The bird high fives me after our segment. The old man asks if I'm on the cruise. We all get out of the rain.

11:00 The show is wrapped. I finally get a picture of Jord and myself. The bird sticks his head in the picture. I get my stuff and go to my car.

11:05 a.m. Five minutes later I'm back at the hotel. Check out's at noon. I pack, check out and head to the next hotel. On the way I try to program my GPS the way Spencer showed me…I still can’t do it. So I pull out a good old-fashioned paper map instead. I spot my next stake- out, try to refold the map…and head to the Best Western where the Comedy Cabaret is and where I am performing tonight.

11:20 a.m. My cell phone rings in the car. It's my long time friend and fellow comic, Allen Enlow, (my son designed his web site). Allen tells me he sent me an email about an independent film that’s being shot. Turns out they are looking for female adventurers. He says I’ll be perfect for it.

11:30 I decide to stop at Wendy’s. I see a Guinness promotion sign in the window. I had no idea that Guinness hooked up with Wendy’s. Makes sense though because they are owned by Hit Entertainment, the same guys who did, Thomas the Train…so they will want to appeal to kids.
I call my friend Ashrita to tell him about the hook up. Ashrita holds the record for holding the most world records, over 100 records he has broken…pogo sticked up Mt. Fuji, underwater juggling…we talk. He tells me he just broke another world record yesterday…pushing a 1400 pound van a mile in 21 minutes. The old record was in 50 minutes. He’s broken it by a lot. He can’t talk long because he is about to attempt the onion eating record. I told him to go for the breath mint eating record next. I always smile when I talk to him.

11:45 a.m. I’m sitting in the parking lot of Circuit City eating my burger. I have to buy mini DV tapes for my video camera and tape my set tonight. Turns out Norwegian cruise might want to use me and fellow comedian, Paul Lyons on their ship in a week. The catch is, they want a recent tape. So I decided to tape, then FED EX it out to them on Monday.
I eat the burger quickly, get out of the car and the phone rings again. It’s my old friend, Bob Paiva. I get back in the car. I know the two of us can talk, and no need for everyone in Circuit City to hear my call.
Bob tells me his daughter, Jamie is doing Podcasts. He wants to know if I would be willing to be a part of her Lady of iscyes show, doing on the road reports. I tell him I’ll listen to the podcasts from home and get back to him on when we can record a session.

12:30 p.m. I’m finally in my hotel room. I unpack. Read some mail I brought with me. Can’t believe MCI still hasn’t cancelled my service. I’ve been calling them for 3 months to cancel and they just ignore my email and written requests. Have to call Consumer Complaints.

12:40 Called “Island Harvest” based on an email my friend, Catherine sent me. I told them I would donate a basket of my books and a 1912 penny from my Titanic dive for their fund raising auction to feed the homeless on Long Island. In the past they have supplied 28 million meals to homeless…so it seems like a worthy cause.

12:50 - 4:00 p.m. Write blog number #25 on breast cancer walk.

4:00 p.m. I walk over to diner a few blocks from the hotel. It's nice to stretch. I order a take out dinner of seafood and salad. I joke with the new waitress who looks a tad overwhelmed. I wish her good luck with her job.

4:20 I get back to my hotel and realize she forgot the soup. I decide to forget it.

4:30 p.m. Spencer calls. “Mom, do you know you locked the cats in your closet! I went crazy looking for them all day!”
“Well how the heck did I know they sneaked in when I was packing? Did you hear them meowing?”
The phone dies.

4:31 p.m. I call back. “So did they poop in the closet? Are they traumatized?”
The phone dies again.

4:32p.m. I call back a third time. “What's with the phones Spencer?
"The reception on this street has been bad all da-"… The phone dies again.
I decide not to call back.

4:45 – 5:00 p.m. Read over my blog, do some editing.

5:00 p.m. Andy Scarpati, the owner of Comedy Cabaret called to thank me for coming in a day early to do NBC10! and promoting his club. We’ve been friends for over 20 years. We speak on the phone for a 1/2 hour, talking about the business, our kids etc. He has given four complimentary tickets to my friends at Auntie Anne’s Pretzels who wanted to come see the show on Saturday.

6:00 p.m. I call my mom. She says she’s loving the new mattress I bought her.
She says she's having the best sleep she’s had in a long time.
I ask, "So how old was your mattress."
"Wasn't too old, about 40 years"
"Mom, do you realize that means you were changing my diapers on that thing."
"Oh" she says and shakes her head.
By George, I think she got it.

6:30 pm. Speak to my sister, she’s having some medical problems and we are trying to help her get through them.

7:00 pm. I jot down ideas for a weekly segment show I’m in negotiations about. I have a conference call on Tuesday and I want to be prepared. I write a list of twenty ideas.

7:30 pm. I look over notes for a private party I am doing on Sunday. I jot jokes down about the 94 year old man whose birthday party it is. The guy was a master pastry chef…I could always say he still has nice buns.

8:00 p.m. I get a call from MVP - a doctor I met while doing the TV show “San Antonio Living”. She’s won a ton of awards on conservation. We are working on a big project together that will take place in Nairobi. She calls to tell me a news item she’s seen that can help us. I’m very excited about this new adventure/project. (And this is only one of many in the works!)

8:30 p.m. I jot down some ideas for promotions for my book, “It Happened in New York.” I will send them to the editor when I get home.

8:45 p.m. I look over my act for tonight. I decide I’m going to try two new bits.
I get the video camera ready, then get dressed.

8:50 p.m. Steve calls and asks me how NBC went this morning. I tell him he’s very sweet to ask. We talk for a few minutes…but then I gotta run to do the show.

9:00 p.m. I walk over to the Comedy Cabaret which is in the same hotel. I get there as the people are piling in. I joke with the other comics. We all rattle of a list of what we've been up to.

My good friend, Mike is the bartender and night-time manager of the Best Western. He sets me up with my favorite drink…a cranberry juice. (no vodka) We make arrangements to go to lunch tomorrow.

I speak to Karen, the Comedy Cabaret manager. She just got remarried and shows me her ring, she's also still coaching a cheer leading team, her passion - I’m so happy for her.

9:30 p.m. It’s show time. Pat O’Donnell goes on first. He is acting as host and closing act tonight. The other comics go on. We enjoy watching each other's acts.

10:00 p.m. I set up my video camera for my set. It’s a small but lively audience.
I do my set, my new bits go over great. I’m thrilled. I’ll have a great tape to send to Norwegian cruise lines.

10:30 p.m. I run off the stage and forget to plug the fact that I am selling books after the show. Doesn’t matter. I will sell some books tomorrow. I check the camera. I rewind…nada. I check again. I stare in disbelief as I realize I never hit that damn record button. I can’t believe it. AHHHH. Me and technology don’t go well together. I sit there for twenty minutes hoping magically my act will appear on tape. Both Karen and I look at my recorder. We both thought it was on….Jeez.

11:00 Shows over. Karen and I are still talking about how we aren’t good with machines. She’s packing up and so am I. The audience is filing out.
I’m about to leave the club but a customer, Vladimir comes up and congratulates me and wants to buy one of my books. I sign it and sell it to him.

11:30 I head back to my room. Fidget with camera some more. I jot down the comedy bits as close as I can remember saying them on stage. I write in my diary for a bit, then decide to read up on some marketing strategies in Forbes small business magazine. I fall asleep.

1:30 A.M. I wake up, realize I went to sleep while reading, turn off the lights, say my prayers of gratitude. I thank God that I am lucky to have so many friends, a good family and a career I love. I go to sleep and am ready to begin the day all over again tomorrow.