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September 2009
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I've discovered something about myself. I'm a loner. This will come as a shock to anyone who knew me or thinks they want to get to know me. Perhaps it will also surprise viewers who see me happily and comfortably joking around with people in many stories I do. News that I'm a loner will certainly come as a shock to me. How can this be? I always thought I was a "people person." Not so. I know and like a lot of people. In fact it's hard for me to find a person in whom I can't see something to like. But (excluding family) I can count my close friends on one hand. And I'm not using my thumb or pinky. When I was young -in my 20s- I had many, many close friends. I spent quality time with a bunch of different people... and subsequently almost no time alone. I loved hanging with my buds back then. Being alone was for being asleep. Fast-forward to today and I spend much of my free time alone... by choice. Hard to believe I've just figured this out. I'm almost 48 years old. Here's how my detective-like brain solved that riddle: My wife is out of town for a week. It's her first extended trip away in our young two-year marriage. I expected that while she was gone I would party with my friends like it was, hmmm not 1999, but maybe 1981. I was cool that year. It was the only somewhat cool year of my life. I was 21. And living in Los Angeles. (Truth be told, my cool years were really only about seven months.) Fast-forwarding again to 2008... my wife is spending time with family out of state and I'm, well, loving every second of alone time I can get. It's not that I don't love my wife or friends. I adore Anna. She's amazing. A true gift. Despite all that I've screwed up in my past, Anna is proof God loves me. And my friends are absolutely dear to me. I treasure the time I share with them. But apparently I love myself even more! Who knew? I'm having a blast being alone. I go to work and head home... do some writing, make dinner and relax. Just chilling. Or is that chillin' no "g"? Not sure. I would have known in 1981. I haven't called anyone to talk. I haven't gone out to dinner. I've done my usual workouts... rock climbing... yoga. That's it. Is it possible I don't need people as much as I used to? Or maybe I didn't need myself as much years ago as I do now. I know the older I get the more I enjoy the precious few who are close to me. I guess that includes me. Okay, I gotta go. All this journaling about me made me miss myself. Peace, Mike
1 CommentsLeave a comment |
mike
first of all incredible stuff in your show(s).
i am a decade younger than you but i know how you feel. in high school i was the guy everyone liked (that's how i remember it anyway). i joined the navy at age 20 for two years and made many friends in san diego never to be seen again.
i then started college for broadcast journalism. after a year of school i met my beautiful wife. i rejoined the navy to support a family in '96(not a journalist). during that time i was stationed in san diego twice, mayport(a.k.a jacksonville, fl), and norfolk. i made many more disposable friends until i got out in 2002 again.
since then i have done everything from car salesman to truck driver. i have maintained a good yet distant friendship with one highschool bud in virginia and i have one other friend who has been around for almost 2 decades now. however, it is the truck driving part that really let me get to know who i was and wanted to be. days of nothing but me and more me let me see how lucky i am to come home to my wife and 3 incredible kids. i have been to all 50 states and probably as many countries but now i am able to come home every night, watch the news, check homework, go to soccer or cheerleading practice, and be dad. no breathtaking ocean view or rocky mountain sunset can compare to a piggyback ride and a bedtime story.