I’m feeling frisky and want to give my three readers something fresh to chew on before the world ends at midnight, 12/31/2006. Besides, it will be journal number 200! And that deserves a full swing.

Okay, the following journal was originally posted on April 11 this year. It’s funny to me. I have a rule: If I can make myself laugh, then I’ve touched at least one life… um, even if it is my own. So here you go. Enjoy the man love…

Regular MTTJ readers (that’s Mike’s Tuesday Trav… okay, never mind) know that whenever a man writes me an e-mail I automatically post it in my journal.

I do this for two reasons: 1. I’d estimate that 99.9999% of the e-mails I get are from women who either like my show, are offended by me, or want to go on a date. A fraction of the women who e-mail fall into all three of those categories.

It’s flattering… but easy to keep in perspective because I actually have to live very near me in my house. I know the guy women want to have coffee with is not nearly as witty or smart as the guy on TV. If your TV could send you different smells, during my show you would be looking around, under the couch, behind a chair, for some old cheese. And then you would realize, “Hey! That odor is coming from the TV screen!” And that would be me.

Okay, 2. When a man writes an e-mail to another man to say, “Good job!” well that’s about the most unlikely thing to happen on earth… so I tell everyone!

Here you go. Two e-mails from manly men followed by my imagined responses…

Dear Mike,
Love your show… catch it as often as I can. Really enjoyed your coverage of the Olympics, and I think it's great that you give your cameraman so much credit. Your stories take me back to my youth here in North Carolina, when it seemed a simpler time and we didn't have to lock our doors at night… much less worry about terrorism. I appreciate your down-home attitude in your stories. You bring a sense of realism, and appreciation to the sometimes quirky people you interview.
Have a good day,
Patrick

Patrick,
First off, thank you for not asking me out on a date. Secondly, HOLY CRAP! Thanks for the compliments! I give Andy as much credit as possible because our storytelling is truly a collaborative process. There are people who work in the same building with us who don’t get that. They think it’s all me. Maybe that’s because I tell them it is. But I say all sorts of crazy things during contract negotiations.
Anyway, thanks,
Mike

Mike,
I was just watching your story on the pro football cheerleader/math teacher and imagine my surprise when you showed a photo of your 9th grade math teacher, Mr. Frank Centofanti. Frank and I were fraternity brothers at Mount Union College in Alliance, Ohio. I know he went on to teach math in his native Youngstown area. I think it was Boardman? I used to see him when I lived in Ohio… a long time ago. I’ve lived in North Carolina for three years now and it was nice to see a little something from my past.
I enjoy the Carolina Traveler show. So to a fellow Buckeye, keep up the good work,
Bob

Bob,
Well if that doesn’t take the cake? How small is this world? You guys must have been in college together in the 1960s, right? I had Mr. Centofanti in, I guess, 1974-ish. I was the class clown. But the big problem was I wasn’t funny. So Mr. Centofanti had to throw me out of class all the time. He paddled me so much (this was back when teachers could smack the heck out of a student) he didn’t have to say anything to me in class, he would just look at me, point to the door and I would meet him in the hallway for my weekly beating. I was just a dreadful student. Not the smartest pencil in the shed. The poor guy must have figured I would end up in jail… or worse… in politics. If you see him, let him know I grew up… but still can’t do math.
Thanks for writing, and GO BUCKS!
Mike

Okay, I have to go paint my master bedroom. It’s vacation week at my house and that means “home improvement time!” I hope you have a Merry Christmas and I’ll talk to you next Tuesday.

OH! We have a brand new hi-def primetime Carolina Traveler show a week from Wednesday, on December 27th at 8 PM.

Don’t forget to stop and smell the people,

Mike Redding