Why is this an "Alert"? What in heavens are we supposed to do because drunken Barrington teenagers crashed their car? What am I supposed to be alert to?

In resposnse to Louie's post, where do see this referred to as an "Alert". This is a news update, and some of us do care about what happens to our youth.

Maybe if Barrington didn't ban alcohol these kids wouldn't be trying so hard to get it and these accidents wouldn't be happening. You haven't heard of alcohol related accidents happening as much in any other town or city have you?? Something to think about Barrington!

So sad. My thoughts and prayers to the families involved.

Leaves me wondering when they will learn...just last month BHS had a convicted felon drunk driver in for a presentation, warning them that it could happen to them too. How true. I'd like to think this will be a lesson learned, but I'm afraid they are just not paying attention to what happens.

This is no longer news from Barrington

When are the parents and adults in Barrington going to stop denying the teens in the town have problems controlling their alcohol drinking?

The fact that the Rhode Island area has lost a precious child, a handsome son, and my nephew.

High time these kids and there parents pay attention.Take the $$$ and the automobiles away,parents show these kids some direction.Wake up people.

I'd like to hear from the parents: Why can't they control their teenagers? Where are the kids getting the liquor from? Barrington seems to have a lot of this. Why???

This is an alert because kids are killing themselves foolishly. They think nothing can harm them. Why is that? Where the heck are their parents??? Where is the supervision in this town? How about the Police??? Maybe their parents should stop traveling the globe and pay some attention to their children who obviously need it.

shame

How many more of these Barrington children need to die before the parents get a clue!! Why are these kids out driving around at 10:51 p.m.? Where is the parental supervision????

11pm on a Monday night? Maybe if these parents set some house rules, some situations come be prevented. If these unfortunate situations had happened in a less afluent town, people would blame the parents for not properly raising their kids, but Barrington's reputation is that the majority of families there raise their kids the right way!

When are the parents in Barrington going to take control of the situation? It has nothing to do with the banning of alcohol in town...it has to do with parents who have lost touch with their kids! Get involved in your kids lives...know their friends...stop burying your heads in the sand!

This is not only a problem in Barrington, Its all over around here. (Rhode Island) The parents need to know what their kids are doing and for some reason many dont. It is very sad.

Parents in Barrinton are not denying any problem, everyone is horrified and working very hard to combat this..this could be anybody's child..in any town.Making this a "Barrington" problem just means that only Barrington kids are receiving the attention and programs, when teen-age drinking is going on everywhere. One week before Patrick Murphy was killed, three Tiverton teens were killed in an alcohol related crash. People were so busy bashing Barrington that the issue was just swept under the rug in Tiverton. Four Fall River kids were killed this summer in alcohol related crashes..I hear nothing about it..don't these kids matter as much??

Another tragic lost for the town.

As a Barrington resident and the parent of small children, this scares me to no end. How can one expect to raise a well adjusted young adult in a community where most parents apparently allow their kids to run amok and are evidently bereft of not only morality but basic common sense.

What I don't understand is how a minor can refuse to submit to a breathalizer test. Our legislators need to wake up. What a terrible loophole for young people to hide behind. Wake up folks, another senseless death.

Please, parents of teenagers. Make a pact with your teen to call you for a ride if they have been drinking. No questions asked. This is not to give them a thumbs up on drinking, but you can't control everything and better to drive them home alive then to bury your own child.

For all of you judgmental souls out there who want to make this a Barrington problem...remember it could be your child or mine tomorrow. It's happening in your town, mine and everybody else's. Please focus on the fact that there is a mother who has lost her baby...and demonstrate your hate for Barrington some other time.

Another life lossed in Barrington due to drunk driving.
That's all this is, and it shouldn't be blown out of proportion anymore by this paper, or other media. The boating accident and the young girl, who is taking stand against drunk driving at the high school, already got enough press. Parents, wake up and take away the car keys and the cars, because nothing else is working.
The kids are going to Seekonk, Providence and East Providence to the package stores that sell for cheap.
The wealthy parents who are handling this completely incompetantly, by spending and consuming lavishly, should be on the stand for negligence and liability.

HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN AGAIN???

how come the person that bought the alcohol is not being charged.

This is the loss of a precious young man. My thoughts and prayers go to his family and friends as they grieve.

Barrrington Parents WAKE UP! When are you going to take responsiblity, maybe when it happens to your kid. You should know where your child is and what they are doing. News Flash! You brought them in to this world, and it's your turn to watch them. Schools also should do drug testing, search all lockers on students. Parents
if you d'ont feel thats fair to your child, then maybe you have something to hide.

I think it's high time for the parents or liquor store owners or whoever is providing the booze for these kids to be held responsible. It's not just a "Barrington" problem, it's a "parent" problem. Someone allowed a 16 year old to be out driving around with friends @ 11 pm on a school night. If I'm not mistaken, it's illegal too. Isn't the law that you can only have one passenger in your automobile unless it's a sibling? Obviously this child thinks that laws are made for other people. I feel for the parents....if it wasn't them that gave the kids access to the alcohol in the first place!

I'm a neighbor to Barrington (Riverside) and all you hear about is how out of control Barrington Teens are...are they just rumors? Unfortunately, I don't think so. Come on parents get involved in their lives, know where they are going and set some guidelines, believe me, they will appreciate your every effort.

I am a former citizen of Barrington. I raised one child who graduated from Barrington High. Is this a case of parental, school or police neglect? Probably not. We always preached that the sin was not in the drinking but in driving drunk. Please show some compassion. Everyone is trying to solve this problem. We couldn't ask for a more cooperative school administrator in Mr. Gray. Kids think they are invinsible. A promising young man is dead. Let us all mourn!

Am I the only one that actually reads the news? There are alcohol related crashes involving kids everywhere. Two kids from Cranston were injured in one just recently. Several Tiverton kids were killed recently and in 2006 there were several Warwick kids killed. I agree with Susan above..are the kids from other towns not news worthy? Maybe people don't think this problem is everywhere because other places just aren't getting the media attention. This will backfire on you people.....

Placeing blame this early is disrespectful and immature...have some respect and keep your "know-it-all" responses to yourselves

how about the kids from tiverton? from fall river? from bristol? all of those towns have had teenage fatalities somewhat recently.

please don't make this is a class/socio economic problem, rather please address the real problem that teens of all walks of life are trying to grow up too fast.

and please respect the child who died and his family.

I agree with Cheryl, you are all arguing about where the parents are; and that kids need to get a clue. Could you stop and think about this childs family. And not just a mother who lost a child but a Father, Aunt, Uncle, Brother, Sister, Cousin, Friend who lost someone so dear to them. This is not the time to be bashing Barrington or parents but to console these people affected by this loss. I'm not saying there isn't parent issues or drinking issues, I'm not stupid, but this is not the time or place to be addressing them. My thoughts and prayers go out to all who are affected by this tragedy.

So sad. It is happening every where yet when it happens in Barrington everyone jumps on the bandwagon.

There are laws regarding young drivers - esp. 16 year old drivers. There shouldn't be all those kids in the car. Again, it is difficult for a kid to tell their friends they can't get in the car - peer pressure. As a parent, I know that I can talk until I am blue in the face and unless I am physically attached to the teen I can not know what is happening every single minute. You can talk to them, set a good example, and ultimately you have to have faith in your child that they will do with right thing and make the right decision.

And about being out so late on a school night - read the article - the kids didn't have school today. Many communities had no school because of elections - and like Barrington, it was a teacher conference/ enrichment/improvement day. Maybe if it had been a school night it would have made the difference.

I feel for the parents of the dead student, and also the parents of the student that was driving. Everyone loses

Castigating parents at a time like this is just brutal and wrong - especially when you have no idea of circumstances. A very sweet boy has just died, a loving son, brother, nephew, grandson and friend. Those of you who criticize, where do you get the nerve to make assumptions, trying to add guilt to grief?

It is an enormous tragedy, and the Barrington bashing simply makes things worse. A minor point: it was not a school night, as the public schools had conferences today, and the students do not have school. As a parent, the only thing I can feel right now is sorrow for this family.

In 1998 2200 youths in the 15-20 year olds died due to drunk driving. 70% of all teens drink alchol. 60% of teen deaths are drunk driving vitims.Scary.Google teenage drunk driving for more information.This is not just in Barrington R.I.It is every town in the country.

I grew up in Barrington and it was NEVER this bad. Maybe because parents actually cared what we were doing...set curfews...asked questions. What were teenagers doing out at 11pm?? Where were the 4 sets of parents? Knowing that school was out the next day; why weren't the police out patrolling the town? Funny thing is they were sitting in my church parking lot all morning today...a little too late yet again!!! There seems to be a lot of Barrington bashing; however, as stated in a previous blog, it happens everywhere. That is the true problem. How are the kids getting the alcohol so easily? My heart does go out to these families. As a mother I can't imagine the pain. I wish I had the answers. Children are our MOST precious gift & parents you had them for a reason. They are not just a status symbol. Children matter; so stop traveling; going out with friends to RICC or the Pats games and leaving your kids behind for someone else to raise and start spending time with them. Let them know that they come first...not you or your social life! Remember family night...time to reinvent in Barrington and Nationwide!!! God Bless

we are not talking about bad parents or bad kids...we are talking about a horrific tragedy that should never have happened and a lesson that should never have to be learned...these are well-mannered young adults with loving parents...we are all human and those of you who believe that you can prevent life's tragedies with legislation or name calling are part of the problem...this is not the time to point fingers but to come together as a community...just because it hasn't happened to you isn't a shining endorsement of your parenting skills...you're just lucky...young teens are going to experiment...we've all done it...you cannot keep them under lock and key nor can you control everything they put into their bodies...noone knows all the facts so please don't rush to such condemning judgments...the only thing we should be expressing right now is sympathy and support...my heart goes out to all involved...from the driver to the 2 other passangers and most importantly to the family who lost their son...all their lives have been altered forever and no one is deserving of such a lesson...

I used to think that Barrington parents were not doing their job. After all, I have a great relationship with my 18 year-old daughter, she tells me everything that matters, we have frank discussions, I know all her friends, they are all good kids and most are honor students living with parents who seem just as smart and on the ball as I am. Right.
Then I learned that my open and frank 18 year old had yielded to peer pressure and gone drinking with friends. This from the kid who has been described in a college recommendation letter as "the most mature and responsible student that I have seen in 30 years".
Now I know better: if my daughter is alive, it is not because I am a better parent, just that our family was lucky.

What else can Mr. Gray's team come up with for a strategy? You would think that the discussion with Mr. Lombardi would scare some of these kids straight? I guess NOT! What will? The graduating classes will be down not from drop outs, but from deaths!

Young people now a days have too much freedom, too much pressure to be the best and have the best, and too little parental guidance. They are made to feel like they are grownups before their time.

True, there was no school today, but even so, a sixteen year old who just got his license should not be allowed to be out driving at 11:00 at night. For this, I blame the parents. The drinking is another issue. A mother and father have lost a child. Why, because someone decided it would be cool to drink and drive. How cool will it be to live the rest of your life knowing you are responsible for your friends death? It's time to wake up. Think what you about to do, before it is too late.

Grandma

Though no words can take the pain away from the families involved, my heart and prayers go out to the Converse's. He was a much loved teenager and was spoke of everyday by his mother. My deepest sympathies and heart felt condolences for the entire family and friends.

To the person posting a comment citing that Barrington shouldn't ban alcohol and therefore the kids wouldn't be trying so hard to get it....that is about the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Even if Barrington didn't ban alcohol state law still prohibits those under the age of 21 froming buying and drinking alcohol. You are an idiot!!!

Brenden Lombardi, is serving a 12-year sentence at the ACI after the car he was driving killed 2 Bristol high school students on Rt 136 in Bristol in 2003. This man (who is now 23 yrs old, just spoke to the seniors at Barrington High School on October 18th!! Just TWO WEEKS AGO these kids sat in an auditorium looking at this man wearing a prison jump suit who was being monitored by prison guards who spoke to them about what his life has been like since he chose to drive while being intoxicated!! I DON'T GET IT. Were these four students absent on that day or what?? Personally I have a 16 yr old son at Mt Hope High school. Given his mentality about racing and reckless driving, I forbid him to get his license until he's mature enough to understand the severity & consequences of his actions. What's wrong with these parents letting their kids DRIVE if they know they're not responsible enough to be behind the wheel!!!!!

I live in the Hampden Meadows area of Barrington. My heart sank this morning when I jogged by a young man placing a candle on the sidewalk where the accident occured on New Meadow. I saw the solemn look on his face and I knew something awful had happened. I'm devastated for the parents, area teens and for the community. But I also know that bad things happen everywhere, not just in Barrington. This incident should not be sensationalized. I have two young children and we moved 3,000 miles to raise them in this small community. We know a lot of teens here who are good kids and have wonderful, caring parents. Something has to be done, not just community-wide, but statewide, when it comes to teens drinking and driving. I pray for the parents of this victim and for all teens in RI that this doesn't happen again.

This is such a sad event,the parents must be heart broken. RI teen's drink, there have always been teens who break the rules, and parents who believe what their children say...even when they lie. We too found our teen drinking w/friends, even at friends homes when parents are there. A fast phone call to get actual information to and from parents is one way to get this under control. Our teen is 18 and was embarrassed that we called the parents of other 18 year olds, but lets face it; todays 18 is yesterdays 15, our kids are immature by most standards. The school programs do nothing- they try, but the students who need the help are not involved, as a culture most parents think their children are being honest, but they are not. Yes, parents need to take control of their offspring, and while 18 may be a 'legal' age for somethings...drinking is not one of them, do not be afraid to call other parents and talk honestly about the limits for your own child. I am sorry for the family's loss, and I am sorry my teen was embarrassed that I called other families...but I am glad our child has learned to accept the reality of their actions. A tough lesson to learn even for parents-18 is not a magic age, and if a child lives at home...the parents need to still be pro-active. Stop letting children run the homes, set real limits, and follow-up. It is not just Barrington, it is the whole state. I understand that liquor can be purchased by teens in Providence, and by asking any drunk who is purchasing at the store.

Change the driving age to 18 -- PROBLEM SOLVED!

I am appalled by the comments that I have seen here. Do you people have no feelings for the families of these kids ? Has no one in this group EVER made a bad decision before ?? We give our children the tools and hope they make good choices but once in a while they make a mistake. Unfortunately, this decision cost a young boy his life. Instead of bashing lets offer some compassion, embrace these families and let them grieve in peace without passing judgement.

How sad. Tragic. Horrific. Beyond words. The world has lost a fine young man. Whether he was from Barrington or Timbuktoo - we all feel the loss. We will give our kids a hug as they leave home and say a silent prayer asking God to watch over them. And he does. But sometimes he calls them home.
I will remember Jon as the fragile little baby boy I rocked to sleep on Christmas Day 16 years ago. I hadn't seen him in a number of years but I remember.
It is not a time for blame. It is a time to mourn. A time to grieve.
And when you go to bed tonight, remember to thank God for keeping you and yours safe.

why are you pointing fingers? if any of these 4 children were your child you would be devistated and need the comforting of your community not the bashing of how horrible they are. Do you really think the driver is happy about killing his best friend? you dont think the pain is enough its worse then any prison sentence he could be facing. So why dont you guys grow some hearts and realize that everybody is suffering; from the lost boys parents to the drivers parents, its not a battle between whose at more fault but a tragedy that should be looked upon with comfort and care

I hope it made you all feel really good to vent against Barrington residents. As a former Riverside girl, I know the strong feelings that people in the area have about Barrington. However, this is not the time to cast stones. Please allow Jon's family and friends to grieve. His parents are hard working people who only wished the best for their child. This is a private tragedy.

Please save your bashing, criticism, assumptions and judgements for another time and place. Unless you walk a minute in these shoes you have no idea what they're going through and no right to judge. Wake up and have some sympathy, enough with the blame game!

As the Times posted these kids were at a house party. Where were the people who owned the house? They are just as responsible as the teen who was driving. I hope they hold those parents partly responsible for this teens death. I would like to know how these parents didn't know these teens were drinking and if they did how they could this acceptable behavior. All parents need to get more involved with their child's and not just say My family were the lucky ones. Parents need to be more strict with their children and less time trying to be their friends. I would rather be seen as a bad guy by my child whose alive then go to my childs grave. I don't understand how these young teens were driving around at 10:50 at night and people thinking its acceptable because there was no school the next day. Hopefully, this death opens up people eyes to what is really going on.

The big question here is - Where are they getting the alcohol from? If they are buying it, the stiffist penalties should be enforced. If they are getting it from home (taking it without their parents knowledge) then parents - stop buying so much you don't notice it missing!!! No one can say their normal teenagers would never do anything like that - NO ONE. Find out how the liquor is getting into their hands. That is the root of the problem.

In response to where the parents were of the boy who died.. I know for a fact they were great parents and not jetting around the globe as someone has commented previously...they were loving and attentive -- These children need to take some personal responsibility. They are continuing to lose classmates and they don't seem to be getting the wake up call. These are NOT bad kids; these are good kids doing bad things and they just need to realize what happens when they do not take responsibility.

I hope it made you all feel really good to vent against Barrington residents. As a former Riverside girl, I know the strong feelings that people in the area have about Barrington. However, this is not the time to cast stones. Please allow Jon's family and friends to grieve. His parents are hard working people who only wished the best for their child. This is a private tragedy.

DAN AND TERRY SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.LOVE FROM GLO AND THE CLASS OF 1975.GOOD LUCK.

Would everyone stop bashing Barrington? All of the other towns have this happening also but it seems that people just want to bash Barrington and get them all over the headlines. Many other towns have had many alcohol related problems and they dont bash those towns. We are working very hard to get this under control... just stop bashing our town.

It is a shame that another teenager has died in a tragic situation that could have been averted. It is not relevant that it happened in our town of Barrington, as teenagers and young adults engage in these foolish actions in every town and city in this state. Instead of gathering at the sites of these accidents, expressing remorse, grieving, and heading out for more partying, it is time for the young people to take responsibility for their own safety and lives, and realize that life is a precious gift that can be squandered, and wasted, in a split second. That responsibility is taught at home, and the proper example should be set for these teenagers and young adults. The whole attitude, promulgated by Hilary Clinton, "it takes a village" is absurd. Responsibility lies within each and every one of us, and especially with those of us who are parents.

This is a tragic accident. A young man got into the car with the wrong driver, was not wearing a seat belt and lost his life. He made a bad decision. For all of you so busy blaming the parents of Jon and the other boys - can you say you have never had poor judgement? I'm sure the answer is no, because not showing love and support when people have lost a child is the poorest choice I can think of. And I imagine that you don't the excuse of being only 17.

To the person who said "Maybe if Barrington didn't ban alcohol these kids wouldn't be trying so hard to get it and these accidents wouldn't be happening" are you kidding me? Yeah let's just hand it out to the kids and tell them it's ok to drink. Think before you talk!!!

It is sickening to think at time when this family is mourning the loss of a son that people would start raising questions about where the parents were or make comments about the town that the family came from. The bottom line is that a life was lost, and as much as we'd love to say that our children will follow everything we teach them, it is not reality. What parent can be with their child 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? We’ve all been in situations where we have done something our parents warned us not to do, and if you disagree, you’re not being honest with yourself. Children make mistakes. Some are lucky and can learn from them. Others don’t get that chance. Did the child make a mistake? Yes, and he paid dearly for it. You can have your views on Barrington, and you can have your opinions on how to stop underage drinking and drunk driving. However, don’t take it out on this family. It is a disgrace that one human being cannot find compassion for another human being at a time like this. Instead of preaching from your soapbox about what a fabulous parent you are, go home and give your kids a hug and kiss. The only way to truly know the pain of this family is to walk in their shoes. Pray and hope that you never will.

You can criticize the town of Barrington, the kids, the parents, the police, but instead of posting comments on a website, why don't you do something to make a change or get involved somehow because until then, the points you are making are invalid and you aren't helping the situation for anyone.

You should not be posting these comments on your website. How do you think this makes the family feel? We, as a community, and as human beings, should be supporting this family through our thoughts and prayers. It is not the time to debate why this happened.

I don't think the issue is bad parents vs. good parents or bad kids vs. good kids. It's about making good choices instead of bad ones. Everybody makes mistakes, but parents are supposed to set good examples.

I don't think anybody is criticizing the kids or parents as "bad" people. People are good, but they need to think of others. We can't live in a society and think that nobody else gets affected by our decisions or won't notice the consequences of our actions.

I think people are upset that some parents and some kids aren't getting the message that they are not immune to horrible things in life. Some people are more vocal than others about wanting everyone protected. NOBODY wants anybody's child to die or to suffer this kind of grief. Underage drinking and driving can be avoided if people really want that. Lipservice won't change a thing. Other parents and kids are scared stiff that some day they'll be the ones who get hit by drunk drivers.

I also think that Barrington gets attention because many of its residents are professional people and well-educated. My guess is many people think these Barrington parents, of all people, should know better.

I raised 5 children in Attelboro and if you think this is only a Barrington problem, you're living in Alice's wonderland!!!

Empathy, sympathy, grief, disbelief, resignation, thanks that it isn't my kid and anger. I'm sure others must be feeling these and other emotions as they read this article and reactions to it.

The good kids in town get painted by the same broad brush as the kids who have CHOSEN to make bad decisions. And that is a shame. We have kids in town who don't drink or smoke dope, are home when they should be, earn great grades or not, play sports, or dance, or debate, or play an instrument, or just hang out on the family couch! Not every Barrington kid is a lush or pothead.

We as a community are not using all the tools we can to prevent this problem, which is not unique to Barrington.

PARENTS need to set high standards and expectations for their kids. Demand accountability. Be there for your kids. Trust but verify. I'm not a Hillary fan, but she says it takes a village...I know kids that drink and smoke dope, but I don't tell there parents because most parents think their kids are perfect or are delusional. Should I try to change other parents behavior? I think I'd be tilting at windmills. We're not suppossed to be our kids friends, we're their parents who are suppossed to set limits and model responsible behavior. Choices as simple as putting on a seat belt or a life preserver could have affected these tragic outcomes.

SCHOOL OFFICIALS and SCHOOL COMM MEMBERS need to be proactive, not risk averse. Education on drug and drinking prevention is great such as the mandatory meeting last month for athletes and the convicted felon who visited the high school last month. Education without enforcement is just wishful thinking. Students with checkered behavioral and legal histories are appointed as team captains with a nod and a wink by school administrators, while they publically proclaim a different story. Why do we not have a police officer in the schools? Why do we not have random drug searches of student lockers to eradicate the drugs we all (parents, teachers, administrators and elected officials) know are being consumed and sold on school grounds. If you're worried about bad PR, don't be. That door is already wide open.

LAW ENFORCEMENT and THE JUDICIAL SYSTEM. Where is the accountability? Kids know that juvenile records are sealed. There are no legal consequences to bad juvenile behavior. Seniors laugh at the judicial system when ignoring the two check boxes on the common application which query if a student has had behavioral or legal problems in high school.

Cars and boats are not toys. When kids make bad choices behind the wheel of a high horsepowered machine, adult consequences result. That should not surprise anyone.

When I hit my knees tonight, I'll pray that my kids are safe and I'll pray for the four families impacted by this latest tradegy who will never be the same.

What a travesty to stand in judgement of these parents! You people think you know everything your children are doing but you know nothing! My adult children are all successful today and have recently told me things they used to do behind my back. They grew up in a religious family where mom stayed home full time and Dad provided for the family. I know now that I am very fortunate that my family never had to endure a tradgedy like this. How dare anybody stand in judgement of these parents! Maybe you feel like you're family is so riteous that you can judge. I assure you..it can happen to you tomorrow!

I may not have known Jon as well as maybe longer time would have allowed me to, but he was a really nice kid. Im dissapointed that people are ranting agaisnt barrington so much, people drink and drive everywhere, and in providence there are gangs and shootings and stabbings all the time. Werejust a bunch of stupid kids who need to learn, and I hope Jon's death will teach everyone here a lesson. Jon was in my grade, and I attend BHS, i think everyone needs to cool it and stop ragging on barrington, I know we need to smarten up- but alot of other towns could stand to do the same- give us a break while our town mourns the loss of a good kid.
-RIP jon converse-

This really is a shame. Shame on the parents of these teens from Barrington and everywhere else! What on earth are these kids doing with their own cars, cash and complete freedom! Are there no curfews anymore? It was my understanding that 16 yr old drivers were not to have passengers, who is enforcing the laws? Let's get the driving age to 18 and get some responsibility back. My heart aches for the families involved but one cannot help to push some of the blame their way. Parents....you need to know what your kids are doing at all times. Ask questions constantly. Pay more attention to them instead of traveling the globe, etc and leaving them to run around unsupervised. May the family find comfort in their memories of their precious son.

I have lived all over the country and settled in Barrington 8 years ago. In all of the places I've ever lived I've never met nicer kids in my life than from this town. From neighbors, church, or schools, the young people are a credit to our community. I'm feeling some sort of hostility toward this beautiful town and I'm unsure where it could be comming from. I guarantee if these people spent 1 week experiencing the closeness of this community and the quality of life here, the hostility would disappear! Let's not forget people, anybody could be a victim of a tragedy like this. In the past year I've heard about dozens of fatal accidents involving young people acting recklessly. They definately weren't all in Barrington.

I know a good amount of kids who go to BHS (I'm a teenager myself). I can tell you they are good people but they have no concept of the future. Everyone who was upset or damaged by the death of Pat Murphy and then goes and gets drunk is acting like a hypocrite. Someone said it above 'kids think they're invicible' and they do. Pat Murphy was in the same junior class as Joe and the driver of the car. They knew he died in a drunken accident but the saddness has worn off. They just want to feel alive because this is their youth and they think they know everything.

The thing that saddens me the most though was that I was in Barrington a couple weeks ago and someone told me 'Oh so-and-so is really drunk and hes going to drive home'
It's like they know what could happen but don't take the keys away.

I just don't understand. I want to get it through their heads.
The fault doesn't lie within anyone than the kids themselves. They know its wrong but its rebellious and it's kind of become a cliche to get really drunk because there's nothing better to do.

I don't know if this gives you any insight to what goes on in that highschool. The only way you'll really know is if you speak to someone who goes there and is willing to be honest with you. Teen's are very secrative.

I agree that all of our kids can make one bad choice that results in the loss of life, and I can't promise that one of my kids won't do the same.

However, I can promise that kids are not allowed in my house if an adult isn't home and that my kids are not allowed at their friends unless I can talk to a parent and know they will be there. My kids are not allowed in a teen's car unless I have seen this kid drive and know from the parents that it is allowed and that the teen is a safe driver.

Further, I can tell you that my kid will NEVER wear a shirt with a keg for a zero in a "Class of '08" t-shirt that I saw a boy at Dunkin Donuts wearing one recent morning, shortly before school. I could not believe my eyes and was also wondering what would happen once he got to school, in addition to being amazed that someone printed such a shirt and it saw the light of day.

The adolescent brain does not have the judgement to determine when it has had enough to drink. The adult brain in the parent has to be ceaseless in ensuring the adolescent brain doesn't get a chance to find out.

My sympathies to the family and friends of this boy.

Just a point of Clarification. Only the Class of 2008 heard Mr. Lombardi's presentation. Therefore, Mr. Converse, a member of the class of 2009, wouldnt not have been present to witness Mr. lombardi's speech.

I think we all need to take some time to allow the family and friends to grieve. The above joke: "The graduating class with be down not from dropouts but from deaths" was not funny and obviously made by an Individual who is so insensitive that thry cannot understand how hurtful small jokes like that can be.

Allow the funeral to go by. Allow John to be burried. Allow the friends and classmates to grieve. Allow the family to grieve. If at that point, you still deem it important to bash Barrington, that would be the best time. It was onyl a few shot hours after Patrick Murphy ( a Lab Partner of mine in a Anatomy class) died when the accusations started to fly. That only created more anger and pain. WHen kids who might be a little sensative as it is, start to feel attacked, they may act out in more agressive ways. I ask, as a student of Barrington, as a friend of Patrick Murphy's, as an upstanding citizen, and as a human being that we allow this tragedy to sink in and resonate with people. I beg the media and critics to show respect and allow some time before the claws come out. Thank you

This is such a senseless tragedy. My heart goes out to the parents of this boy. I too have a 16 year old son that attends Mt Hope high school here in Bristol and I can't even fathom anything like this ever happening to my him. This is every parents worst nightmare. I try my best to educate my son about the dangers associated with drinking & driving. As I'm sure that all of these kids involved had been educated in some fashion, either by their parents, the school system, and particularly drivers education classes upon getting their licenses. The system didn't fail these kids; and neither did their parents. These kids should have known better; and probably did; but all it takes is just one time to get behind the wheel intoxicated and your life (and someone else's) could be over.

I think about when I was a teenager and how many times (we all) did stupid things; like drinking & driving. Sure, most of us don't want to admit it, but in my generation we didn't have the education about the severity of DWI like the kids do today; yet more kids die today than they ever did before. We can't change the mentality of our youth. Like generations in the past, teenagers will always think they're invisible; no matter how educated they are (so it seems).

What we need to do is change the laws. Sixteen is way too young to be driving. These are children not adults. How can you expect children to make adult decisions? Just because they can reach the peddle doesn't mean they're mature enough to get behind the wheel of a car. I think the problem could be solved if they raised the driving age from 16 to 18. I know it's only two years difference, but the difference is that had this law been in effect today, this boy would still be alive.

How about everyone just shuts up for a minute and keep your comments and opinions about Barrington parents and there teenagers to yourselves and give Jon Converse a moment of silence, because he deserves it.

shame on the PROJO for turning this tragedy into a political battle. This article should have focused on the tragic loss of a beautiful human being not a forum for moron's to blog. God bless the Converses.

I am a highschool student who does not go to Barrington High, but I do know the young man who was driving the car. I did not know Jon though, but my prayers are with him. It's not just Barrington, it's Rhode Island. My boyfriend lives in Little Compton, right next to Tiverton, and he knew the kids who died in several car accidents this summer. Me, being merely 16, have hugged too many crying teenagers. I have heard to much gossip in the hallways about these accidents. We're all sick of it. It's disgusting. I am scared to drive at night because who knows what teenager will come around and hit me. WHEN ARE WE GOING TO LEARN? When are parents going to be parents? WAKE UP, stop enabling your children. The parenting in Rhode Island is pathetic. Teenagers obviously cannot seem to control themselves so maybe parents should step in. I pray that this does not happen again. My condolences to the Converse family. May this be the last time.

Honestly, come on now, I agree with the Barrington mom. You people don't understand, and if you think the same stuff doesn't happen in your town you are clearly ignorant. I am from Barrington, and I am underage, and yes I have drank before. The problem here is a very very stupid decision, but for parents of kids from other towns to pretend that your kids aren't making stupid decisions, well your not only as "ignorant" as you claim Barrington parents are, but your are also very hypocritical.

If you want to judge someone how about this. I knew John, and he was a very nice kid, he always would talk to you, and wasn't judgemental, harsh or mean to any other kid. Sure he drank occasionally, but when does that judge someones character over the good things they have done.

Mr, Converse is also one of the nicest men I have ever met and known in my life, and through soccer and other town functions he has given plenty back to the town of Barrington. He certainly didn't condone drinking at any level.

The driver of the car made a terrible mistake, which unfortunately is the second such mistake in the last couple of months. The parent's who have posted here I am sure have made a million mistakes when they are younger, and just because you were lucky and no one died doesn't make you any less guilty then this kid

So my last statement is, please just allow people to grieve and feel. A great kid died yesterday, and for you to sit and judge him based on one mistake is simply close minded.I hope you all take a deep look at yourselves, because if your teen that you "know" doesn't drink made this slip up, I'm sure the last thing you'd want to hear the day after is that you screwed up as a parent.

So take a look at yourselves before pointing the finger...

RIP Jon...rest with ease

everyone who is bashing barrington should stop because the same things are happening in your towns also. barrington is a great town, and a great place to raise kids, but everyone does make mistakes and whoever is bashing barrington should think about what they are saying, because you all make mistakes in your teenage years also.

kids will always attempt to do things behind their parents backs, the majority of the world is probably guilty of that, but I assure you as a parent I will not host drinking parties at my house, which has happened in a few occasions here in town. How about the parent that knew her older son who is 22 bought a keg of beer for her younger son who graduated this past year from BHS?
Sometimes it's not COOL TO BE COOL!
St. Lukes' website has a great audio clip created by Father Matt about underage drinking and denial.
Families, take the time in listen to it as a family.

Barrington is a wonderful town to live in. I used to live there. Grew up there and i didn't become an alcoholic. I don't even drink. People are lay back and leave their cars and doors unlocked. You cannot stub your toe in Barrington without it being reported all over the news. Kids in Providence get shot everyday, steal and sell drugs. Providence kids in HIGH SCHOOL can't even write and put sentences together. They can't add or multiply. All towns and cities have their issues. Drinking and driving, underage or not is a problem all over. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the Converse family and we know that at any point it could be a loved one of our own. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the families of the two victims on Route 95 that were killed last week. More awareness should be made about how powerful an automobile is and that speed can kill. Seat belts need to be worn at all times as well. Please give the family the privacy they need.

I am discusted with everyone who has used this as an oppurtunity to argue and discuss Barrington, laws regarding alcahol, and critisizing the parenting of these children.

Maybe this "could" have been prevented, but a tragedy has happened. How can you point fingers at the people who are suffering? Are the parents of Jon Converse bad people because they allowed their son to be with his best friend on a night before there was no school? Until your hands are clean how dare you make these harsh judgements. Now is not the time. My heart goes out to everyone who knew Jon, and the driver, who must live with this for the rest of his life, and is suffering more than most could ever imagine. The families and especially the parents you critisize are being affected more than you, so give them some respect. How can you not see how this is not fair? Many of you say at 16 you are just a chlid and too young to drive, then think about how young the driver is having to face this tragedy. I am sorry for all of the hurting.

This breaks my heart. When will our kids and our community get the message? How many of our precious children have to die before our community takes their heads out of the sand and faces the truth that is taking so many of our children? As a parent of three Barrington High School students, it saddens, angers, and confuses me as to why our town has not taken more serious, prompt action to protect all of our children. I have been extremely disappointed with the complacency of our law endorcement officers, school officials and too many adults in this community for several years about the culture of accepting unacceptable behavior. As a long time Barrington resident, I've lived to witness way too many of our families bury their children and the community looks the other way - as if it doesn't involve them. As one who has expressed personally deep concern to authorities about what needs to be done to protect our children and being told that these kind of things are being addressed, it sickens and saddens me that our town and the families of the boys involved in this incident are facing yet one more avoidable tragedy. It is time for us all to stop hiding inside our handsome homes and come out publicly to be given the opportunity to be part of the solution instead of continuing to allow these things to keep happening to our precious children and our community. Law enforcement, school authorities, town administrators and our state legislators MUST work together to end the epidemic that has engulfed our town. Our deepest and most sincere condolescences go out to the Converse family and the other families whose boys were involved in this senseless accident.

Minor point- Mr. Lombardi only spoke to the senior class on the day he spoke at the school.

I come from a family of 8 and have siblings with children all over the US. This is not a problem that is exclusive to Barrington, nor is it due to parental cluelessness, it is a sad truth that is happening everywhere. This is a universal issue that people have been grappling with for years. During my high school years back in the 70's in Massachusetts there were 4 teens who were killed in car recks, back then the alcohol element was not publicized. There are many who like to get on soap boxes and preach and villify, it is easy to blame, what is not easy is to face the reality of drinking and alcohol abuse, it is a cultural issue, one that is not exclusive to teens or Barrington, and has nothing to do with affluence. Obviously zero tolerance does not work with young people, perhaps an on going dialogue and support system with positive, respectful, open conversation and ideas could be a start. As a parent of two Barrington High School students I know that the majority of us are vigilant involved parents who are not trotting around the globe and leaving our children home to self destruct, nor do we bury our heads in the sand. And our children are bright, hardworking, wonderful human beings. The insults here from some people are only indicative of their ignorance. I was just talking to a friend in Wellesley Massachusetts, she has a son in High School and that town is going through the same thing, many teen deaths, car wrecks with alcohol involved, not to mention teen suicides. If you are a parent who has written a self righteous comment here and you are perfect and live in a perfect town where all the teens are angels then god bless you...but i believe that you may have YOUR heads in the sand. The most judgemental statments on this comment wall come from the most uninformed and hateful people, and I feel sorry for you all. You have nothing constructive to contribute.
Barrington was weeping today as much as the rain was pouring down.

May we please cut to the chase? Most of us carry bitterness of one kind or another. Most of us feel wronged or belittled for whatever series of reasons. This is my first experience engaging with a "blog" whatever that is -- and I only do so because I am the aunt of the boy who has paid this price and I live so far away that any contact is better than none. He was the son of people I cherish who have spent their lives doing their best for him. So until I can get there.... May we all simply realize that loss is loss. It is human. It is terrible. It is inconsolable. There is no fault or blame. There is only grief. We are connected in grief.

STOP the blame game now.
Rather, give thoughtful condolences, help, friendship to Jon's grieving mother, father, sister, family and friends, to the families of the driver and other passengers.
Jon's parents are hardworking, involved, loving, fine parents...not the 'typical' wealthy, traveling, hands off, Barringtonites depicted by some thoughtless writers. Have some compassion, please. Allow the families involved to grieve in peace.
RI, work to change the driving age to 17.

I have read some of your comments here and the people who say let this family grieve in peace .THis problem with underage drinking is all over just not this town or state.some of these comments I have read i think come from people who dont have teens yet or have what they think the perfect teenager boy are yu in for a rude awakening.AS parents we dont get instrucions when our children are born we have to learn as they do when they grow to be responsible adults.We all try to do our best to be the parent we should be for our children and hope they make better choices.I think at this time maybe some of you are asking does she even know what she is talking about I have to answer yes I do I am Darien Plass's mom the boy who die in west warwick beacause an adult made it easy for him to have alcohl the night he died.Yes my son made a bad choice and ow our family paid the price for this.

Other communities do have tragic accidents occur as others have pointed out. But this small community, Barrington, has had 3 in 2 years. This does show there is a problem in that community that needs to be addressed before there is a fourth tragedy!

At what point are we allowed stop "showing compassion" and start fighting for a change? If Barrington wants this "media conspiracy" against the town to go away, perhaps the people of Barrington should make a serious attempt at changing the culture. Someone above used the term "personal tragedy" to describe the incident. Which it is. So if you know this family, please, support them in this time of need. But as far as I'm concerned, if you want to stop and cry everytime one of our fellow citizens suffers "personal tragedy", you're going to be short of tears before the week is out. The cultural problem in this town lies with the parents who continue to defend the "honor" of their collective children by- diverting attention to tragedies elsewhere, citing a greater issue of teens drinking everywhere, and ATTACKING concerned parents who are afraid to let their own kids out on the road. You know what, it wasn't so long ago that I was that age and making bad decisions too. Here's a clue as to how I've been able to grow into an adult: my parents put me under a microscope, took my car keys, took my TV, checked my homework nightly, forced me to get a job, and didn't let me so much as talk to my friends until I had straightened out. And guess what? While classmates of mine were dying on the highway, I was growing into an adult. Perhaps Barrington's parents should stop diverting blame and blaming the media, and try parenting for once.

So far these tragic accidents have not caused the death of an innocent driver in another vehicle just out minding their own business. Parents in ALL area's in the state need to wake up. If your supplying the alcohol you should be heading to prison alone with your child.

"RI, work to change the driving age to 17"

Why? So we can punish ALL 16 year olds who need to be able to get to their afterschool jobs because Barrington can't control their snobby, entitled, drunk kids?

Maybe we should take all drivers licenses away from old people because occasionally one of them mistakes the gas for the brake and runs over a doctor?

First and foremost--WHERE ARE THESE KIDS GETTING THE ALCOHOL?? We are not tslking about a few mismatched cans of beer-they are getting their hands on 30 packs--12 packs-bottles of liquor-Right now, along New Meadow Road, there is an empty 30 pack and 12 pack--every weekend, from New Meadow to Warren Ave in Seekonk, one can find discarded alcohol related litter-I think the town needs a curfew-for both the parents and the kids--Parents need to stay home instead of worrying about their social calendars and who they want to impress--everyone here is afraid to be a non-conformist-no one wants to make the first move out of fear of being black-balled--there is too much of the "all kids drink and party" attitude in this town

I recently graduated from Barrington High School and am utterly appauled at the comments made by so called adults. How can you possibly talk about Barrington kids like that after such a horrible tragedy? Calling them snobby, entitled, drunk kids..I don't think it is very appropriate at this time. Obviously changes need to be made but it is not only in Barrington. As many other people have stated, this has happened in many other communities but for some reason it isn't as big of a deal and it isn't just parents diverting the attention. It is the truth....all you need to focus on right now is that we lost a great young man. Show some compassion for all those mourning, especially his family, and point fingers later.

It is unbelievable. Here is a young man who had a provisional license, had beer delivered, decided to drive drunk across state lines, drove recklessly, refused a breathalizer test and had the nerve to plead not guilty. Isn't it about time that our children start taking responsibility for their actions! I understand that we all make poor choices at some point in our lives but take responsbility for those choices and not hide behind mommy/daddy or blame others for those choices. The saddest thing is that the result of having a blatant disregard for rules or others led to the loss of a precious life which has forever changed the lives of everyone.

some of u people just have no heart and no respect for life. this poor kid and his family are going through so much and you continue to bash the parents and the kids. his parents were loving and caring it had nothing to do with that. you people need to get your facts straight before you start saying stuff like that. they were out late because we didnt have school the next day and were trying to get home.

R.I.P J.CON LOVE YOU...

Ladies and gentlemen, the prior unprecedented remarks were made by the same pigheaded, ignorant morons that might sit on a jury for one another someday if they are ever tried for negligent homocide. Don't worry - it'll be Darwinian.

I apologize for changing the subject entirely, but there seems to have been a child that has died in a car accident here. If I am correct, the child was not driving. Why must the majority of people concentrate their efforts on berating the community in lieu of showing support for the family of the deceased? Why must the envy and jealousy of the privileged life FEW LIVE in Barrington reflect in the comments posted?
In short, get the facts straight, don't make derogatory comments about people you don't know and view stereotypically. Furthermore, Providence seems to have been riddled with teen shootings, why don't some of the fervent commentators choose that foray rather than generalizing a towns worth of people.
God Bless the family affected by this tragedy, look to the perpetrator, not the victim to vent.

Everything has already been discussed, so admittedly I have nothing new to add, but certain comments have pissed me off enough to deliver my two cents: it is rash ignorance to insinuate "enforced curfews" or "stricter parenting" would have prevented this tragedy. High and Mighty is a convenient place to reside when living outside the intimate sphere of this event. You must know nothing of life to misappropriate blame so wildly when the simple fact remains: occasionally (and do not presume all of us have never taken ill-advised chances), poor judgment results in catastrophic effect. It is not that we don't know better, it is not that we are unaware of our own mortality, it is that 99 times out of 100, these kids get home safely. This is no excuse, but it is the truth. Drunk driving is idiotic, but not uncommon. You'd have to be naive to see things differently.
Additionally, Barrington is wonderful, and certainly attempts to instill every kind of caution in its youth. The kids in this car are damn decent, with parents who love them with all their hearts, wanting nothing but their safety and well-being. Awful things often happen to wonderful people; there is no explanation, no recourse, no valid preventative measures...In the end, all you can hope is that people will make good decisions and when (not if) they make mistakes, it will turn out ok. A community has been rocked by an instance in which things did not turn out ok; anything but mourning, condolence, or remembrance is crass and futile. I feel dirty even allowing myself to be dragged into this conversation.
Hindsight makes perfect critics of us all; we cope and we learn, but we cannot point fingers. It has happened before and it will happen again, here and elsewhere; tragedy is ubiquitous, and the only relevant emotion now is sympathy. And I am sorry, to all of you.

i think that to keep out kids safe we should have a curfew for kids who are under age because i think with that this will help keep our kids safe and from getting in trouble