Projo Garden Blog

Favorites, flowers, feelings, knowing on Mother's Day

11:38 AM Sun, May 11, 2008 |
Pat Feinstein    Email

cattleya-3.jpg
Cattaleya orchid


What is your favorite flower? What is your most favorite flower?

These are among the questions I have been known to ask my family, friends and colleagues for years.

I am not talking about the meaning of flowers. That you can find out from many websites. I only want to address your (or anyone’s) personal feelings for especially liking certain flowers.

Because of my psychiatric training and years in practice, I look for how people react to questions, not just the answers they give.

My own criteria for ‘favorites’ -- for a book or movie -- are those I want to read and see again and again.

-- Roses, sunflowers, tulips and orchids are among the most often picked as ‘favorites’ among the majority of people.

-- A person’s favorites can change, for various reasons.

-- Have you ever heard the saying, “Tell me what you think of the weather and I’ll tell you what I think of you”?

-- You can make a game out of it during a gathering. Ask people to match the answers with the person they think would have said that.

I believe I can make an interesting and fairly good assessment of a person from his or her chosen favorite flower, especially among those who are close to me.

My oldest son told me that his favorite was an orchid. I said “There are so many kinds of orchids – you need to tell me which one”. I showed him picture after pictures until he said, "That’s the one." It was a Cattaleya, pictured at the top of this post.


My second son’s favorite was A Bird-Of-Paradise:


bird4.jpg


My daughter named Bleeding heart and Sunflowers as her favorites.

bleeding-heart-.jpg sunflower.jpg



My husband’s favorite flower is Tulip:


tulip.jpg


Mine, strangely enough, has always been a Cattaleya.

social bookmarking

Comments

tina said:

l have always loved pink roses. am that type who will go with any thing beautiful and since flowers bring a beautiful feel . its very easy for me to love them.



Beth said:

I love whatever flower will grow in my yard! Think of all the ones that are mowed down all day long. I like the purple clover that my rabbit loves to nibble, the buttercups that glow yellow under my daughter's chin and the dandelions that tell us whether or not he loves us and later remind us to make a wish. Maybe my favorite is the crocus because when I was in college, someone bought me some in a small terra cotta pot and they amazed me when they bloomed because I had never seen any before. They were deep purple, still my favorite color. Or maybe it's a peony because they are so full of beauty and scent that they can't even hold themselves up. Or better yet, those big magenta dahlias at the state fair. Lillies of the Valley and daffodils still intrigue me, too. Marigolds are so strong and earthy. I don't know, Dr. Pat, I can't really decide, but I think that is one of your nicest entries.



pat feinstein said:

Tina,

Many roses are so intoxicatedly beautiful and English pink roses are just 'classic'. The 'Jessica Mitford' who was my son-in-law's grandmother had a rose garden in her house in Oakland. I am sure roses were her favorites. I never got to ask her if her sister, the Duchess of Devonshire had a favorite flower. It would be interesting to find out. She had written many books on her gardens and estate.

Beth,

Thank you very very much. I am so glad you like it.

I know how you feel. I fully understand and " Everything is beautiful in its own way " .
Many of my friends picked peonies as their favorites. My late sister-in law's ( Sandra Feinstein Gamm) favorite was a Gardenia. I don't know anyone else who picked Gardenia as their favorites.

You know that I love many flowers.

Try - come up with 3 favorites, then 2 then 1. See if you can. Perhaps you can leave your own garden for a few minutes and pretend that you're at the flower shop and you have - lets say $25? "Which flower would you pick to buy for yourself?"..



Elizabeth said:

Lilacs... partly because our last few homes have not had enough sun in the yard to grow them, and I miss having them nearby. I love the scent, the beauty, the way they toss their heads in the breeze.



pat feinstein said:

Elizabeth,

I also love the Lilac and the way they move in the blowing wind. Mine is 20 years old and at the left front corner of the house. I can't imagine not having it. I also love lavendar, a perennial shrub that has much longer blooming period- I actaully have several in my front yard.

There are so many flowers and flowering trees that I virtually could not live without.i.e daisies, which my second son also loved, almost as much as he loved the Bird-Of-Paradise.

I came tp love and appreciate Borage after the nice people at THE GOODEARTH introduced them to me.



Beth said:

I just realized that every time you mentioned a flower, it made me think of a particular person – peony, a friend in Swansea; lilacs, my dad's mother, who always had them on her counter when in season; roses, my mother's mom; dahlias, Martha Smith because she gave me some at a farm one day; sunflowers, my sister, who stood in her pajamas beneath one of the biggest ones in my yard for a photo (if I showed it online, she'd kill me); dandelions, my mom, because I used to give her bunches of them when I was little. That's probably why memory gardens are so popular, because they represent a person we loved with colors, scents, peace and beauty.



Lilacs are the first flower I was aware of, as a baby. I remember being held up to smell them, and the delight of their aroma. It's never left me.

I wish they were ever-blooming. Their season is too short, even as it does mark the years with memories of other bloomings, and the events at the time.



Favorite flower? You mean I have to pick one?! I love orchids of all sorts, but that's just the tip of the iceberg. Can't I just say that my favorite is whatever is in bloom right now?



pat feinstein said:

Sheila,

Imagine - your Lilac awareness moment as a baby! That's precious.

I remember passion flowers at the house where I grew up, by the canal and all kinds of flowers at our 'second home' plus my grandfather's love for growing orchids.

Alan - You don't have to, but you should - just for the fun of it. It's nice to appreciate anything in front of you, but you can also have a choice, not always leave everything to 'chance'.

I love to make people 'think' - obviously and to be light-hearted about it. We call this line of questioning - 'an imaginery, verbally-projective typed question' - to reveal one's feelings, identification, orientation and relationship to people and objects.

If you like a little more challenge - try answer this one.. "if you could choose to be a flower, which flower would you choose to be?"

Mine is still a Cattaleya.



Pat, if I could be a flower I'd be a vine -- morning glory or American wisteria, maybe a clematis -- so I could grow high and travel, seeing the world from many viewpoints.



pat said:

Thank you very much - Sheila.
I love your answer, reasoning and imagination.
I bet Beth would not want to be a dandelion as much as she was sentimental about it.



Anonymous said:

My favorite flower? My nana, Rose Liguori.

Andrea




Leave a comment





Type the characters you see in the picture above.