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July 2008
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The ladies' true spirit of competition comes out this week as host Chris Harrison reveals that there will be 2 one on one dates and one group date, giving the remaining 10 lucky ladies the chance to fight for their man. Matt goes on his first one on one date with Holly to Grauman's Chinese Theatre, where Holly wears what I swear can only be described as an animal print bathing suit cover up with heals. They are interviewed by the mock paparazzi as they walk the red carpet into the premiere of Maid of Honor...the sponsor of this week's episode...PLEASE! Matt and Holly are given a private viewing of the movie, where we get to see their laughter and tears, followed by a quiet evening at the Roosevelt Hotel. Matt explained that he was extremely comfortable around Holly, but wasn't sure if there was enough electricity....so of course they have to get in the tub! How can anyone know if there is TRUE chemistry until they have a chance to curl up in an enormous bathtub in their bathing suits, surrounded by candles and bubbles? Oh yeah...that saucy tart got a rose! Next came the group date. What could possibly fulfill this British hottie's fantasy more than watching 10 girls role around in the mud engaging in his favorite past time...rugby?! The group date begins with some warm ups, where all of the girls lunge around the field in extremely short shorts and rub mud on themselves for attention. After splitting up into two teams, we get to see which girls have what it takes and which ones wind up with busted lips and frozen peas in their mouth. I'm not actually sure if it was frozen peas that they stuck in Marshana's mouth, but it was definitely one of the most original ways I've seen a girl steal some one on one time. In order to reward the ladies for all of their hard work, Matt brings the ladies back to his bachelor pad for a little pampering. I thought it was funny to listen to Marshana talk about how thoughtful it was of Matt to think about bringing in the masseuses...like it was his idea! Seriously, you girls aren't that stupid. Matt doesn't have anything to do with it. The producers come up with that stuff. How else are they going to get more half naked shots of the ladies in compromising positions with Matt? They can only shoot so many pool scenes. Case in point, after Matt's cannonball into the pool, Matt invites Captain Kelly to have a one on one massage session, where Kelly basically mounts him like tiger, and shows him just what she can do with her paws. The ladies are forced to compete for Matt's attention and carve out some alone time. Robin seemed to be the BIG WINNER when it came down to getting her man. Matt tells Robin that he loves her because she's smart and she's beautiful and she's not afraid to get her hands dirty. Then he invites her to get into the hot tub to get them clean. A little predictable, but she does get a kiss and the rose. This seemed to be the last straw for the ladies. The claws definitely came out after that and so did drunk Kelly, as she explained, "that never in a million years, if I was a dude, would I want to date her". Well that is a relief and I'm sure that Robin can sleep easy now that she doesn't have to worry about your advances. The final one on one date goes to Shayne, who has the "MOST DRAMATIC WARDROBE CHANGES" on the show. Who goes from wearing a retro style t-shirt and straw hat, to a black mini dress and knee high white leather boots? That would be Shayne. Thank goodness Holly remembered to pack her portable self tanning machine...no I'm not kidding. I don't know how Shayne would have survived her date without the extra coat of self tanner. But of course Matt is so excited for his "hot date, with a hot girl, in a hot car" that he barely has a chance to notice. Matt and Shayne take a drive to an amazing wine estate, where Matt tries to figure out whether Shayne is the "best thing since sliced bread or one sandwich short of a picnic". The one thing that Shayne does reveal is that her father is the "Renegade", Larenzo Lamas. I'm sure that he would be extremely proud of his little girl as she explains just how high maintenance she really is. As she puts it, this is her top 5, "I'm into cars, shoes...oh my God, hand bags, sunglasses, and watches. I think you can have all those 5 and it really doesn't matter what you're wearing on your body." Apparently it doesn't matter whether you have intelligence or a genuine personality either...as long as you have amazing eyes and 400 pairs of shoes...you're gonna get a rose from Matt...Shayne did. The remaining girls tear into Robin before the rose ceremony for taking Matt away during Amy's one on one time. Ohhh here she comes...Robin's a man stealer...watch out girls she fights for what she wants! I'm hoping a few of you caught the Hall & Oates reference. Anyway...I think they were all just looking for reasons to hate on that girl, but the fact is, her strategy worked. Amy went home. The episode would not be complete without Amanda and the "meeps", who once again prevailed as one of Matt's top picks. Christine and Erin S., however were not as lucky. I guess when Matt pictures his dream girl, she doesn't have the voice of a waitress from a road side truck stop or work full-time as a hot dog vendor...go figure! Oh and If I were you Shayne...I'd tell those girls to stay out of my luggage and keep their stanky feet out of my shoes! |
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