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October 2009
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Taylor: June 2009 Archives
You know you're having a bad day when you can't find your drawers. You know you're having a really bad day when you get your head stuck in a clothes dryer while you're looking for said undies. But if you end up trapped, bare-bottomed with the dryer on your head and a crowd of friends, police officers and paramedics gathers to point and laugh ... well ... you're starring in a bad day trifecta the likes of which normally exists only in my fondest dreams. It's finally summer, folks! You know what that means? Cockroaches the size of small children? Yes! Car seats so hot they burn your behind? You bet! But - perhaps most importantly - it's time for the oft-dreaded family vacation. You know, where you pack your screaming children in a tiny car with about 6,000 pieces of luggage and a grandparent of some variety and take off on an adventure, putting the "fun" in dysfunctional. Happy times! But aside from your vile, bratty, ridiculously filthy siblings who WON'T STOP TOUCHING AND/OR LOOKING AT YOU, most family vacatio... Being an American grants a person a certain number of liberties. You have the right to free speech, freedom of religion, the right to a fair trial and the right to sit on your behind all day long in your jammies eating Cheez Whiz and watching "Cops" if you feel like it, dang it. (Best. Country. Ever.) But a couple in Colorado believe they have to right to garden in thongs and pasties, and - shocker--that's not sitting well with their neighbors. |
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