So - Kermit's a pedophile, you are mastering your balls, and some unruly news anchors are murder suspects??? Looks like I've been watching the wrong news!! Thanks for more laughs J.

Kermit touched me in my special place. He took pictures and said it was for him and all of his froggie friends. Now, I find that kids today can earn two to three grand a week with webcam work. Technology, I hate you.

Sincerely,
Bill Gates, Esq.

Dear Sirs,

Isn't it true that you often
make up for a lame letter by
signing a funny name?

Sincerely,

E. Normous Penis
Fallen Trousers, Texas

I grew up in Fallen Trousers too.

Come read this:
http://community.woai.com/blogs/random/archive/2006/08/01/715499.aspx

Dear Mr. E. Normous:
I think we'd make a great couple! Are you "up" to it? Please don't "stiff" me on this question. I hope I'm not making a "boner" by being so forward...

This blog is getting crude.

Why are there so many people that act like JERKS on the internet? Seriously, would you ever say this kind of stuff to somebody's face?

No.

Because the internet gives people anonymity it allows people to be childish.

I expect this from Walton and Skip but not from nameless losers.

OK people.... clean it up!!!! Or I'm gonna get in trouble.

I don't want to have to censor... but I may have to if we keep going down this road.

Wow... people find a place to leave comments and become idiots (or maybe they already are idiots, now they just have a place to prove it)...

My most sincere and utter apologies. I was merely aiming for a cheap laugh. No more disgusting, filthy, vile-ridden prose shall be spouted from my fingertips upon Johnathan's most professional blog.

If one is a fan of the old National Lampoon Letters to the Editor, one would know where I am coming from. Sadly, the humor is lost on some, but that's okay. We're all different, no matter what the liberal "I-Heart-Diversity" moronic pundits would spout.

Hey Jerrod,

I hope you are doing Walton the favor of linking his blog to yours.

Dear Sirs,

I would like to submit the police-cam video of my field sobriety test to Johnathan Walton for future inclusion within his blog. Everyone knows what a sense of humor I have, especially when Daddy fixes everything for me by leaning on the mean old people that tryed to ruin a night out on the town.

-Elena

Funny Elena.

Very funny.

Actually, Miguel, I haven't yet...but Johnathon loves me, so its all good. He even gave me a copy of "Brokeback Mountain." Its true. Ask him.

An unopened DVD of "Brokeback Mountian"

For the record.

Yeah, its true. But its the thought that counts. Do you still have that talking Yoda/Furby thing I gave you?

Well, all I gotta say is as long as she didn't insult the cop's heritage or call him a demeaning racial slur, that's all that matters. After all, it doesn't matter if you're wasted behind the wheel and poised to kill a human being - what matters is whether you're a bigot or not.

Sincerely,
Mel Gibson

He clasps the crag with crooked hands,
Close to the sun in lonely lands,
Ring'd with the azure world, he stands.

The wrinkled sea beneath him crawls,
He watches from his mountain walls,
And like a thunderbolt, he farts.

-Alfred Lloyd Tennyson
-High On Something

I thought Walton was crazy but now I know there even more nuttier folks than him.

Hey, Bobby, are you passing out bad drugs at KHOU or something???

i just wanted to say that u will make a good anchor one day in the newsroom.... well without the crazy around you lolol!!!! them bulls really wanted to get it on it was time!!!!!!! keep up the good work!!! god bless...

a friendlt friend liz...