Transformers:
Henriksen (Merc): "A big, loud, shiny, goofy, unapologetic Saturday morning cartoon."

Mohan (O): "When these piles of metal go at each other, you realize why Bay gets paid the big bucks."

Keogh (ST): "An extraordinary third act that sets a new standard for marrying visceral human action with thrilling computer-generated effects."

The bottom line: If you like giant transforming robots, it's worth suffering through the humans and lackluster script.

License to Wed:
Covert (O): "To say the picture isn't funny is putting it mildly. It isn't tolerable."

Humphrey (Merc): "A denouement so fantastically STUPID that you mime stabbing yourself repeatedly in the throat."

Axmaker (P-I): "If you can't predict how it all turns out, you've never seen a family sitcom."

The bottom line: This movie scores an 8% at Rotten Tomatoes. That puts it below the terribly-reviewed Evan Almighty. Reviewers are stumbling over themselves to come up with the most vicious critique possible. The winner so far is A.O. Scott at the NY Times:

"The only thing that kept me watching "License to Wed" until the end (apart from being paid to do so) was the faith, perhaps misplaced, that I will not see a worse movie this year."