Covering the death of 18 year old Emily Egan
One of the things I dread the most in my job is the phone call to the home of a murder victim.
It never gets easier. I cringe at the thought. Even typing those words feels intrusive and abrupt and out of place.
And yet---the call is often necessary. Most of the time it’s the only way we know to connect with the family of the victim.
Often they don't want to talk with me---which I totally understand. But sometimes they do. Today was one of those times.
I called the family of Emily Egan to see if they had a nice picture they'd like to share with the public---or perhaps a comment about her life--maybe even some insight to why someone would murder their daughter.
When Terry, Emily's mom, answered the phone and said---Hi Pat---we were thinking about calling you---I was stunned. But then she reminded me her family attends the same Catholic Church as I do---and her son attends the same grade school. The story became much harder.
I always try to relate with the people I'm covering---and often feel at least some of their emotional pain---but I rarely cover someone I know. This was different.
Emily's father, John, had been to my house not long ago to pick up some information for our school's upcoming auction.
The family's hope about the future had suddenly turned to disbelief and horror.
Their little girl was dead in a downtown apartment---the 37 year old she shared the place with was charged with her murder.
I eventually interviewed Terry for the newscast and was moved by her sorrow and her anger over the world her daughter had been sucked into this past summer.
She told me Emily had met a man in May---just a month after her 18th birthday. She'd struggled with a bi-polar disorder---attended St. Mary's for a brief time---then earned a GED from Pacific Crest---an alternative school.
Her mother believes the man, Paul "Gene" Frizzelle had given her daughter drugs and groomed her for the porn industry.
Terry had worked to gain her daughter's confidence---and she says--recently convinced her to return home.
Emily was supposed to leave her apartment Wednesday morning August 29th.
I can not imagine the beginning of the nightmare as she watched the news Tuesday night.
"My son and I were watching the news last night and we rarely sit down together at that time and
we saw a newscast about a young woman that had been murdered. And we looked at the newscast and we commented that it looked like the front of Emily's building. And I said, well, I'm gonna call her because if people are getting murdered in that building she needs to get out right now!" said Terry.
She called her daughter's phone---but she never answered. She was already dead.
Frizzelle is charged with her murder.
Terry Egan believes there are many other young---18 year olds in the Portland area who have fallen prey to the same sort of men---and she is vowing to turn her despair into action---to help.
Here's a quote from Terry Egan we could not squeeze into the tv story---
"I'm not gonna let someone like that destroy Emily. He may have murdered her---yes he did---but he didnt murder who she was here and who she was in her community and who she was in her family."
And he is inconsequential to me and he will get punished as he needs to be. Who should be worried are the other men out there doing that. Because I'm not kidding. I don't have a plan right this second, but this is not the end. She's not the only who that's out there."
I'm sure the family would appreciate any thoughts or prayers you'd like to offer.
Emily and my best friend were close friends. We both saw her several days before her body was discovered.
My friend is sobbing currently. If she could get Terry Egan's contact information, to find out about any kind of memorial service or just to express her condolances, we'de both really appreciate it.
mariafiala@gmail.com
Please, any help at all?
Terry, John: Oh, God, I am so sorry, the unthinkable has happened to Emily. Please remember what good parents you have been to Emily--patient, dedicated, fierce advocates for her. Know that you have the support and love of the community around you as you grieve.
Christina Malango
Within a day in the PNW, a powerful Senator's arrest is revealed for exercising his not so carefully concealed sexual preferences thereby causing an entire state to be stripped of its political power while a beautiful, young, sick girl is murdered by a sexual exploiter. The mythical shame of Adam and Eve, throughout history, seems to leave more destruction in its wake than any war. Perhaps it is the root cause of war as some students of the mind contend. If human sexuality poses such a problem, what is the solution?
At least your editors got the title to the story correct, unlike how your competitor handled it. An 18 year-old is a woman, or even a young woman, but not a *girl*.
This happened to me. Only I lived. I am in total shock. Someone needs to EXPOSE these girls to the idea these men are out there. It happens to the most vulnerable.
My condolences.
Terry,
My heartfelt condolances go out to you and your family at this horribly difficult time. I had a daughter that was hit by a car and killed at 8 yrs. old and I to was in denial and shock thinking she was just late in coming home, she will be here. then the next day came and the next and next and when she didnt come home then it hit me she wasnt coming home.With God's strength you will make it. Becoming an advocate to help others in the same situation will help you to heal and help keep Emily's memory alive. I also have a 32 yr. old son who is bi-polar and know the difficulty in that. He is niave and vulnerable as well. He has been taken advantage of by women who take his medication away and try to control him.They think they can handle things on their own without parental help and want to "fit in" somewhere and it sounds like that is what happened to your beautiful daughter. you were a good parent and dont ever let anyone say otherwise. It is very hard to have a bi-polar child and if you havent been there you just dont have a clue. Lord Bless you and your family.
I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost a child and I know how difficult it is. Four years ago my daughter who was 16 at the time went missing. I contacted the authorities, but runaways were not high on their list. I finally tracked her down on my own. They found her in a basement in a hidden room. She was so brainwashed that it took a short amount of time to completely turn her into someone I didn't know. After at least a year she finally started acting like the daughter I raised. There was only one (1) officer in the Vancouver Police Department who was willing to help and he didn't give up until he found her. I am so grateful. I feel he saved her life. I found out a short time later he was dismissed. I'm sure his methods were unorthodoxed, but they got my daughter back, and as far as I'm concerned that's what counts. Any help that I can be I will certainly do it. Just let me know.
I do not know if you remember me but eye was in emily's class at madeleine. emily was a wonderful person, you know that, she will be greatly missed but never forgotten. if there is a memorial or funeral for emily eye would like to know when and where if that is okay so eye can attend. if it is private, that is perfectly understandable. i dont know how to reach you other than this so please email me and let me know if eye can do anything to help you in your plans.
Stay Strong
Mallory
Dear Mr & Mrs Egan,
I offer my heart-felt sympathy and deep outrage over the tragic loss of your daughter's life. I write to bring you comfort and hope born from my years of working to help women escape the sex industry. Yesterday, Pat Dooris came to interview me because I founded and for 11 years led the Council for Prostitution Alternatives (CPA)in Portland. Four thousand women came through our doors during that time, each desperate to leave a life that they knew they hadn't chosen and didn't deserve. We turned no one away. Thousands of women(from all ages)are alive, safe and leading self-sufficient lives -- out of prostitution, stripping, and pornography-- thanks to the dedicated work of the counselors at CPA and to the many supporters from the community who marched in the streets to "take back the night," and generously helped with donations so we could truly offer alternatives, such as housing, medical care, food and transportation.
I know you know your daughter was being groomed to work in the sex industry by a pimp. Almost all women in the sex industry are similarly compelled to enter via pimps and maintained in systems of prostitution by pimps and dangerous sexual predators, also known as johns.
The comfort and hope I am offering is this: There is a community and a world that is working to stop the sex industry. CPA is coming back again after a hiatus,but the model has been replicated in other cities. The sex industry is being vastly researched and exposed in countries across the world. Trafficking in women and girls is now on the radar of the United Nations - and human rights policies have been written to decry and outlaw the inhumanity of systems of sexual exploitation. Police departments understand the central role pimps and so-called johns have in creating the demand and maintaining women and girls in the sex industry. More and more, police departments focus detective work and arrests of these perpetrators, and understand that prostitution is a crime of violence committed against women and girls -- who, along with their families, are the victims of this crime. Men's groups are taking up the challenge to educate each other to stop prostitution, pornography and the strip industry.
These cultural changes have happened only in the past twenty years and are aimed at imagining a world without sexual exploitation. We who take up this challenge, still tragically too ineffective to prevent Emily's death, are committed to extinguishing the sex industry. Someday, I believe deep in my heart, we will prevail. Enough victims will come forward to testify. Enough communities will take up their outrage and demand and end to the age old industry in human trafficking. I believe this because, like Anne Frank, I know that "in spite of everything, people are really good at heart."
Dear Mr & Mrs Egan,
I offer my heart-felt sympathy and deep outrage over the tragic loss of your daughter's life. I write to bring you comfort and hope born from my years of working to help women escape the sex industry. Yesterday, Pat Dooris came to interview me because I founded and for 11 years led the Council for Prostitution Alternatives (CPA)in Portland. Four thousand women came through our doors during that time, each desperate to leave a life that they knew they hadn't chosen and didn't deserve. We turned no one away. Thousands of women(from all ages)are alive, safe and leading self-sufficient lives -- out of prostitution, stripping, and pornography-- thanks to the dedicated work of the counselors at CPA and to the many supporters from the community who marched in the streets to "take back the night," and generously helped with donations so we could truly offer alternatives, such as housing, medical care, food and transportation.
I know you know your daughter was being groomed to work in the sex industry by a pimp. Almost all women in the sex industry are similarly compelled to enter via pimps and maintained in systems of prostitution by pimps and dangerous sexual predators, also known as johns.
The comfort and hope I am offering is this: There is a community and a world that is working to stop the sex industry. CPA is coming back again after a hiatus,but the model has been replicated in other cities. The sex industry is being vastly researched and exposed in countries across the world. Trafficking in women and girls is now on the radar of the United Nations - and human rights policies have been written to decry and outlaw the inhumanity of systems of sexual exploitation. Police departments understand the central role pimps and so-called johns have in creating the demand and maintaining women and girls in the sex industry. More and more, police departments focus detective work and arrests of these perpetrators, and understand that prostitution is a crime of violence committed against women and girls -- who, along with their families, are the victims of this crime. Men's groups are taking up the challenge to educate each other to stop prostitution, pornography and the strip industry.
These cultural changes have happened only in the past twenty years and are aimed at imagining a world without sexual exploitation. We who take up this challenge, still tragically too ineffective to prevent Emily's death, are committed to extinguishing the sex industry. Someday, I believe deep in my heart, we will prevail. Enough victims will come forward to testify. Enough communities will take up their outrage and demand and end to the age old industry in human trafficking. I believe this because, like Anne Frank, I know that "in spite of everything, people are really good at heart."
Let me put it another way so as to perhaps not offend the sensibilities of the KGW blog censors. Last night, I watched a brilliant documentary on OPB concerning the lives of Charis Wilson (a Catlin graduate) and Edward Watson centering upon his nude photographs of her and their loving relationship. A few years ago, I attended a wedding in Portland where two Native American male friends of mine publicly pledged their love in marriage, a relationship they have maintained since then. Compare these experiences with the vicious murder of eighteen year-old Emily Egan by a drug-addicted pornographer and the arrest of Idaho's senior senator for sexual solicitation in a public mens room. What is wrong here? What is wrong with our culture here?
". . .the crime that goes along with it [Portland's sex industry]."
The lead quote in your story of August 30 from a Portland police officer goes to the heart of the problem.
What aspect of our culture is the source of the reprehensible practices that force society to criminalize significant aspects of sexuality? We certainly have many diverse models of loving intimacy to promote. Why the vicious and mean? Why the anonymity?
I think it's important to remember that this horrible crime had nothing to do with the industry the people worked in, but rather their drug use and domestic problems.
It's also important to remember that pornography is legal, as is the production of it. Many people go about healthy productive lives and work in great jobs and careers that are related to this industry.
People like Gene Frizzle are predators, regardless of what they do for a living. Gene Frizzle was unknown in the adult business. He had no distribution, he had no real business to speak of, and was simply someone trying to get into the business and failing at it. He is in no way representative of the adult industry as a whole (though I myself am not particular familiar with Portland's scene).
Please see the legitimate adult industry's reaction to this, as taken from AVN Magazine:
The incident has shocked adult-industry insiders such as "Darklady" Teresa Reed, who told AVN Online on Thursday that she was "clueless" about who Frizzelle was and had never heard of the man prior to his arrest.
"I've never encountered this guy, and so far I haven't been able to find anyone else who's ever heard of him," she said. "It's all very sad."
Wasteland Inc. CEO Colin Rowntree, who also said he does not know Frizzelle, said the arrested site operator "gives everyone a bad name in the industry." Rowntree said that any model taking a job with a "solo shooter" should check the photographer's references and have a male escort present, since those situations can be "very dangerous."
"The few incidents I have heard of over the years - where models are either harmed or, in a few cases, killed - all came from this sort of �solo shooter' situation," he said. "Reputable studios in the industry always have a good number of staff on hand for shoots, and this keeps things very professional."
Rowntree also urged models and actresses to register at OneModelPlace.com, "where they can check references, chat with other models about past experience with photographers and read some very helpful articles about how to stay safe."
Emily was a good friend of mine. I met her at school around 3 years ago, and we had been friends since. But I feared for her when she told me the types of things she was doing, but I never knew things had gotten so bad.
I am bothered by some of the news reports, because so many of them seem to label Emily as a pornographic model, above all else, which she absolutely was not. She had her problems, but Emily was a kind, forgiving, and trusting person, and she was honest and respectful, and would always try to help anyone who seemed like they needed it. I will miss her greatly, and I offer my deepest condolances to her Parents, John and Terry Egan, and to her little brother too, because I know she was always close with him. I am still too shocked to really believe what has happened, but I hope that this will open some eyes to some of the problems that many young women seem to face in today's society, especially here in Portland. It is easy to get swept up in the culture surrounding porn and drugs, but I hope that is not how Emily will be remembered, because that was not who she was, even if she was involved in it.
Emily was a loyal friend, and I will miss her, and think about her always.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Eagan,
I offer my deepest sympathy for the tragic loss of your daughter's life. As the mother of a daughter, my heart truly aches for you, as I am sure does the heart of every parent in this city. And as a woman and a mother, I would like to personally thank you for the extraordinary courage with which you have chosen to meet the loss of your daughter's life. Thank you for your unselfish determination that we must stop pimps and predators before other girls like Emily are sacrificed.
You show brains, guts, and unselfishness when you state that Emily wasn't "the only one out there." Any girl is potentially at risk. I believe that your stance will inspire others to join you, strong in love for this city's young people, outraged by the many, many pimps who comprise an industry that systematically profits off of and preys upon our young girls. As current executive director of Council for Prostitution Alternatives, I have joined with Susan Hunter's fight against the evil and seamless web made up of pornography, stripping, and prostitution. We will win this fight because of people like you, who join the battle rather than taking the more comfortable path of looking the other way. Thank you for broadening your love of Emily to encompass all the many, many girls who are at risk.
Terry and John:
I wanted you to know that I have just heard of this sad news and my family and I are heartbroken. Emily was a beautiful child, who I had dreamed would become a wonderful woman. I am so sorry that her life was cut short. Her memory is still just as vivid in my mind as the last day I saw her. I stood in awe of the light that surrounded her. Please know I remember you and your family in my prayers and I am thankful right now that I had a chance to see her grow up.
God bless you.
Dear Teri and John,
I am still upset over Emily's death and when the phone rings I sometimes think Emily might be calling to ask if Melissa is around, but then I remember that she can't call anymore.
I just wanted to let you know that Emily will not be forgotten very easily. She was one of the nicest girls I had ever met even though she had her difficulties.
Rose
I am so saddened by the loss of this YOUNG promising young life. I am probably the only one posting that is acquainted with Gene's family. They are devasted and heartbroken. Gene was raised in a Christian home. He chose a diffent path. Now he must suffer the consequences of his actions. This has been a tragedy for BOTH families. Gene's family has been inconsolable. They love their son, but the also want him to face the consequences of his actions. He also has lost his life in a way. He was a promising photographer. Now that is all gone. None of us knows why people make the choices they do. For Emily's family you have my deepest sympathy and condolences.